7 Personality Traits Of Happy Kids (Who Grow Into Successful Adults)
Encourage your child by understanding yourself.
Colin + Meg | Unsplash Let’s face it. Who goes into parenting not wanting to raise successful, happy kids? The problem is parents often mistake the successful personality traits of happy kids with less favorable traits of defiance and rebellion. Instead, based on their perception, they impose on their kids what a "good" personality trait is and what success "should" look like. These impositions are rooted in the way they were parented. It also stems from their unmet needs, likes, dislikes, and unfulfilled dreams. Kids are individual beings with their minds and souls.
Here are 7 personality traits of happy kids (who grow into successful adults):
1. Self-expression
Your child will feel the freedom and safety of being their true selves.
2. Bossy or opinionated
This reassures them they are assertive and can think for themselves.
3. Curiosity
They become a seeker of truth. Curiosity helps them gauge what feels right and makes sense to them. In doing so, they build on their intuition.
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4. Fearlessness
They have the willingness to try new things and test boundaries. It helps them know their limits while gaining experience.
5. Relentless
They learn to test limits to find an answer, so they don’t quit easily when faced with obstacles. They know what they want and are driven to get it.
6. Creativity
Creatives and dreamers with big imaginations do amazing things in and for this world.
7. Rule Breaking
They refuse to be put in a box and love to find new (and often ingenious) ways of doing things. They have their minds and like to challenge the status quo — and themselves.
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Each of these personality traits lends itself to authenticity, which, in today's society, is the most valued commodity.
Whether or not you birthed your children or adopted them, they will have their way of approaching their world. Children also model the world around them. As a parent, what you do and say and how you act and react to them shape their behavior — which follows them into adulthood. And while you are influential in this way when it comes to raising happy kids, their personality is just that — their personality. Their personality must be encouraged for them to be happy kids who grow into successful adults.
Have there ever been times when you were just being you, having fun, and feeling like a rock star, only to have someone shut you down? Can you remember dreaming big dreams and imagining an amazing life for yourself, only to be told to be realistic and get your head out of the clouds?
Is there a time when you responded to a situation in the same way as was modeled to you, and you got punished for it? Do you remember what you were thinking and how it made you feel? For starters, I bet you were incredibly confused. And then I bet it wasn't long before you began to realize who you needed to become to gain acceptance. More often than not, that meant leaving the real you behind.
What did that do to your ability to trust yourself? When you reflect on your childhood and have empathy for your lost self, you can step into the mind of your child. Doing so allows you to have empathy for your child who is trying to find their authentic place in the world.
All it takes to encourage your child is to understand yourself and what you need/want. You owe this to your child and you owe it to yourself. Allowing your children the freedoms you may have had stolen from you will help you to raise happy and successful kids. The happiest kids and the most successful adults were encouraged to hone in on these personality traits.
Suzanne Jones, NLP, is a parenting coach and mentor who works with prospective adoptive couples with unresolved issues surrounding their childhood that will cloud their ability to parent.