6 Signs A Guy Is A Selfish Lover In Bed
He only cares about himself.
Billion Photos | alessandrobiascioli | Monkey Business Images | Canva Men can and often do finish through intercourse. Very few women can and do, without external stimulation. So, it is in some ways easier to be a man in that arena.
In principle, men can finish a lot. Most women cannot finish most of the time. without some extra help. Yet, anecdotally, too many men are either completely confused about this fact, or they are selfish in bed. If they are confused, they just need some education. If they are selfish, there is probably not a whole lot you can do about it, except cut your losses and move on.
But how do you spot a selfish lover before you end up becoming too attached?
Here are 6 signs your guy is a selfish lover in bed:
1. He often asks for massages but never returns the favor
He will find an excuse for why you need to work your knuckles off. For instance, his legs are sore from his recent workout.
2. Foreplay is virtually non-existent
He might check to see if you are ready to go without any warmup. If you are not, he will bring out the lube so he doesn't need to do any extra work.
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3. You have gone down on him more than a few times, and he has not yet returned the favor
Worse: you have asked him to go down on you, but he always has an excuse for not doing it, or he simply says he doesn't like it.
4. After he finishes, he rolls over and goes to sleep, unconcerned about whether you finished or not
Or worse: he sends you packing and on your way.
5. If you orgasm during intercourse but he didn't, he finds it unfair
He might joke about it, or even shut you out emotionally for a while, despite the fact that you did all the work yourself.
6. He prefers sex positions where he doesn't have to do any work
This is one of the major signs your guy is a selfish lover. And if he is really selfish, he will pull out just before he finishes and points himself in your face or puts himself in your mouth.
Now, these are only cues that your man is selfish in bed because some men are simply uneducated. Others think you don't mind being intimate in these male-focused ways because you never expressed your needs. But if you clearly express your needs and the bad behavior continues, then you have a selfish lover on your hands.
Get away from him before the two of you end up getting serious to the point where you are inclined to put up with deprivation for years to come.
Berit “Brit” Brogaard, D.M.Sci., Ph.D., is a professor of philosophy and Director of the Brogaard Lab for Multisensory Research at the University of Miami. Her work has been featured on Huffington Post, MSNBC, Daily Mail, TIME, Psychology Today, and ABC News.