10 Signs You're Really Bad In Bed (But He Feels Awful Telling You)
Yes, it is possible for girls to be bad in bed.
Motortion Films / Shutterstock We all know the signs that someone is good in bed. People will go the extra mile to keep them around, even if their personalities are terrible in relationships. They often have reputations for being great. But there are some people out there who are just really bad in bed.
The good news is that sex is as much a skill as it is an innate talent. If you find out you’re bad in bed, you can do things to make yourself a pro.
How can you tell if you’re bad in bed, though?
Well, these signs tend to suggest them pretty well.
1. You usually can’t get a guy to sleep with you a second time, even if it is no strings attached.
Most guys love sex and will rarely say no to “NSA” fun. As a result, most guys will be happy to hit round two, three, or four.
If you’re really awful in bed, though, they may not actually find it pleasurable enough to want to go again.
2. If you were honest with yourself, you really don’t like sex.
Believe it or not, it’s pretty obvious when a girl isn’t into sex. Not enjoying sex makes it very hard for anyone to want to be enthusiastic or do work to please their partner.
Most guys, upon realizing that girl doesn’t like sex, will back away because the lack of enthusiasm is both ego-crushing and off-putting.
3. You feel ashamed for being sexual.
Most guys I’ve spoken to agree that this kind of sex-shaming is a major indicator that a girl will be bad in bed. After all, no one wants to have to be with a partner who cries after sex or acts like their sex partner is horrible for enjoying sex.
Thankfully, there are ways to unlearn this toxic thought pattern. Even if it’s from years of being brought up in a Puritanically strict household, this unnatural, unhealthy attitude towards sex can be overcome with therapy, and that therapy will be worth every penny.
4. You have confidence issues.
If you really can’t stand looking at yourself in the mirror, there’s a good chance that those insecurities are bleeding into your bedroom life, too. Confidence is sexy, both in and out of the bedroom. So, you might want to work on your self-esteem.
5. You have one set bedroom routine, and that’s all you ever do.
At first, this can be sexy. But after a while, your partner will get bored of it... and even the hottest routine will eventually get old.
If you want to improve your sex life, you might want to be more open to switching things up.
6. If you were honest, your pleasure is the only pleasure that matters in bed.
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to get off, but there is something wrong when you forget that you have a sex partner who also has desires in bed. Nobody, male or female, enjoys a selfish lover.
7. You never really tell guys what you want, or listen to what they want.
A huge percentage of great sex is based on communication. Guys aren’t psychics, so if you can’t tell them what you want, you can’t expect sex to be great.
Similarly, if you don’t listen to what they want, they’ll end up getting frustrated with you, too.
8. Sex is almost always a rush to the finish line for you.
There’s nothing wrong with a quickie, but if your main focus is to “get it over with,” you really need to rethink your attitude on sex.
Most of the time, guys want a girl who will take her time to really enjoy their bodies, not a girl who starts asking if he’s “done yet” after 2 minutes.
9. You don’t bathe.
I totally understand the allure of “hippie musk,” but the fact is that for 99.9 percent of people, cleanliness counts. It doesn’t matter if you’re a woman, a man, or a non-binary person.
If you want to be good in bed, you need to not smell like a garbage dump. Even the best moves can’t salvage the mood if you reek.
10. Your partner shuts down after sex.
Whenever this happens, it’s really not a good sign. At all.
If this happens on a regular basis, there may be something you’re doing that’s seriously bad to these guys... and not in a good way.
Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer based out of Red Bank, New Jersey who writes primarily about lifestyle, food, finance, and relationships. You can follow her on Twitter.