Do Not Mistake Me For A Woman Who Will Ever Take Your Crap
Thanks, but no thanks.
WeHeartIt We have a tendency to give our all when it comes to relationships.
It's sweet really.
We want the person we're with to be the happiest they can be. And while this slightly selfless — in a lot of cases we expect the same gestures in return — it can really screw us over.
Relationships come with a lot of unnecessary expectations.
As a partner, we're supposed to support the other person completely (even when they're acting like an idiot), find them attractive 24/7 (even when they don't shower) and show them love and affection however it means the most to them (even when they don't want to tell us what that is).
This mindset is bullshit and unsurprisingly leads to a lot of broken hearts.
While I could go on and on about the specific kinds of expectations we need to let go of, there's one important one we all need to really get: being in a relationship doesn't mean you have to put up with the other person's sh*t.
You are not a superhero. You are not supposed to be there no matter what.
Being able to do that and keep your sanity is a total fantasy.
Let's say your boyfriend has had a bad day at work. He comes home in a mood and starts lashing out at you for the house not being clean. Now you know logically that he's not pissed at you, but at his job. Yet here you are, apologizing for something that you don't need to apologize for and feeling guilty for making him mad.
This is the kind of crap you don't need to put up with.
Now I'm not saying scenarios like that are worth a breakup. Usually they're not. But rather than stay there and listen to him yell at your for BS you didn't cause, leave.
Like seriously, get your purse and go to your friend's house or a coffee shop or the gym.
He's mad, and you being there is just putting yourself in the line of fire.
If a guy knows that you're just going to sit there and take it when he yells at you for BS that has nothing to do with you, than he's going to keep doing it.
Don't be the girl who plays victim.
If you're not happy with a situation, you have the choice to get the hell out of there.
It's your life and you have control over what kind of crap you'll put up with.
Just make sure it's worth it.
Emily Blackwood is a writer and editor who covers relationships and pop culture.