Many Women Cry After Masturbating (And It's Not As Weird As You Think)
You aren't alone if you do this, ladies.
margo_black / shutterstock Everybody masturbates. And if they aren't masturbating, they should be. Sexually satisfying ourselves gives us a sense of well-being and makes us feel better, physically and mentally.
Masturbation has so many positives like relieving stress, sexual tension, and body aches, and it can also help you sleep. Self-stimulation helps you stay sexual, even when you're between partners. There are so many health benefits to masturbation that everybody should be doing it all the time.
But what about those women who end their masturbation session by crying for seemingly no reason? Is that normal and healthy?
Why do I cry after masturbating?
Sobbing after flying solo isn't the same as post-coital blues (feeling sadness, anxiety, depression, restlessness, regret, or irritability after consensual sexual activity), but it can feel very similar.
In an article for Elite Daily, Sheena Sharma describes those times when masturbation is followed by crying, writing: "Sometimes just a few tears and other times a huge bout of sobbing."
She wanted to find out if crying after masturbation was a dangerous sign of a bigger issue or if it was completely abnormal.
Was there a medical reason for post-masturbation crying? And if there was, was there a way it could be prevented?
She found many admissions from women that they, too, cried after masturbating. And that while it wasn't that uncommon, there's not a whole lot of research on this subject.
There's also some confusion about whether or not crying after masturbation is considered a crygasm.
For some people, a crygasm happens after climaxing, when one cries out of a sense of joy at fantastic sex, while others define it as reaching a climax by crying uncontrollably.
No matter what your definition of a crygasm is, we can all agree that masturbation or two-person sex isn't just a sexual release — it's an emotional one too, and sometimes you express that release by crying.
One anonymous reader discusses how she reacts after masturbating.
"I crash down from the high of the orgasm really quickly — almost immediately — and start feeling incredibly lonely and depressed. My spikes in libido often end with me curled up in a ball crying because I feel so alone. I know this probably isn't normal, but do you know what might be wrong with me?"
Writer Logan Hill responds that, while it isn't out of the ordinary to feel tired or lonely after masturbation, if you feel that way every time there could be a problem.
Hill responds, "I'm sure you've considered the fact that the sudden crash from orgasm to depression may be compounding or highlighting some psychological issues. If that even seems like a possibility, I'd recommend that you speak to a therapist."
No one wants excessive crying to be part of their regular routine. But on the other hand, sexual issues you find odd don't always imply there's a concerning psychological problem underneath.
As Sharma puts it, "Your tendency to cry might have a simple explanation: a hormonal imbalance, waiting too long to masturbate, and letting too much tension build or even your subconscious reflecting on that breakup you went through a lifetime ago. It just may be that crying could be completely out of your control."
We don't just cry because we're unhappy or hurt; sometimes we cry out of joy.
We cry because it's part of our human emotional package, and like masturbation, you may do it occasionally or all the time.
The important thing is to allow yourself to do it and release what you need to let go of.
Christine Schoenwald is a writer, performer, and teacher who loves writing and performing personal narratives. She's had pieces in The Los Angeles Times, Salon, Woman's Day, Purple Clover, Bustle, and is a regular contributor to Ravishly and YourTango. Check out her website or her Facebook page.