3 Signs Someone In Your Life Is Way Too Needy, According To Relationship Coach Of 25 Years
Surefire ways to know if your needs are getting out of hand.
Marina Polovinkina | Canva Are you too needy in your relationships? If so, you may sabotage them even when you've found a good man!
The most recurring problem women tell me about is their inability to maintain a long and committed relationship with a man because of their constant sense of neediness.
According to research published in the National Library of Medicine, codependency is described as "an excessive preoccupation with the lives, feelings, and problems" of someone else — and for some, it can lead to the end of a relationship before it even starts.
So, what are some of the main ways you can be too needy and cause yourself constant heartbreak and disappointment with men?
Here are 3 signs someone in your life is way too needy:
1. Your neediness can show up as possessiveness and jealousy.
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Nothing is more miserable than being overwhelmed by your sense of not being good enough. It makes you clingy and overly attentive to a man's every move while you ignore your feelings and needs.
2. You are determined to set good boundaries for yourself but can't maintain them because you are worried that the man won't like you.
This can result in you getting intimate with a man before you know he's committed to you or letting him treat you in a way that makes you feel like you're not a priority in his life.
3. You'll hold back your feelings and opinions with a man so you won't disagree with him and rock the boat.
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You won't be judged wrong if he thinks you agree. You'll also avoid any conflict that could erupt from you expressing your personal opinions.
If you're too needy and dependent on a man, you will be a slave to your feelings. It will keep you in chains of desperation, and you will never be able to relax and be yourself with a man.
Neediness and codependency have been found, as research from the National Library of Medicine indicates, more in housewives — putting them more at risk for increased psychological symptoms and negative self-perception.
There is only one cure for being too needy: emotional freedom! What does emotional freedom feel like when you're in a relationship? It feels like confidence.
Instead of being too needy in your relationship, you no longer depend on the man you're with to make you feel safe, worthy, or loved. Emotional freedom requires that you stop seeing yourself as a victim.
It requires that you take responsibility for your feelings and act on them accordingly. When you take on your emotions as "your problem," you create less drama in your relationships—less anger, blame, and resentment.
When you've worked on yourself and are no longer needy and desperate in your relationships, you will find emotional freedom and a great sense of worthiness that you create for yourself and that no one can take away from you.
Virginia Clark is a relationship coach with decades of experience and the author of It's Never Too Late to Marry: How to Have the Man and the Marriage of Your Dreams.