Working Mom Asks Coworkers To Stop Judging Her For Sending ‘Snippy’ Emails & Leaving Work Right At 5PM
Having two careers at once is no easy task.
Yan Krukau / Pexels Being a parent to young children is already difficult enough. When you add going to work full-time into the mix, it makes the responsibilities even more intense.
One working mom understands the challenges all too well and is asking her co-workers to have compassion and grace for her every time she goes into the office and has to leave her babies behind.
She's pleading with others to stop ‘judging’ her for her workplace behavior.
Jamie Johnson is a mother of two young boys — Henry and Simon. Additionally, she works full-time and documents the struggles of balancing her personal and work life in a series of blog posts and essays on her website “HashtagMomFail.”
In one of her essays titled “From One Working Mom to Another,” Johnson opens up about the guilt of working full-time while raising her boys. She asks that her fellow co-workers have empathy for her as she navigates motherhood while balancing a job.
“Please stop judging me for leaving the office at exactly 5 pm, but my kids are waiting to be picked up from the sitter,” she writes. “I know I’m missing this meeting, but my kid’s preschool graduation is more important.”
The working mom explains that if she appears to be distracted at work, it is for a good reason.
“I have a sick toddler and I am waiting to find out when I can get him into the pediatrician,” she reveals. It is difficult for her to present herself as alert and awake when she has been up all night with a sick toddler.
She explains that her short temper at work also relates to her home life. “I didn’t mean for my email to seem snippy, but I have a five-year-old that cried this morning because he didn’t want to go to school, and I am worried about him,” she says.
Johnson claims that when she comes into work, she and other moms are expected to “leave [their] personal lives at the door.” As a parent, this is a particularly daunting task since half of your heart is elsewhere during the day. She often struggles with her emotions, exhaustion, and guilt over not being as present for her children as she’d like to be due to a demanding work schedule.
She thanks her coworkers who have understood her pain and given her grace throughout the years.
“Thank you to everyone that has given me grace over the last five years,” she writes. “I could probably stand to give myself a little. Being a full-time working mom with young kids is not easy.”
She gives a shoutout to all of her bosses over the years who have allowed her to leave early to shuttle her kids to doctor’s appointments, all of her co-workers who didn’t bat an eye when she was pregnant and left in the middle of a meeting to be sick, and those who have also told her that they were working parents who struggled as well.
“Thank you to all the other moms that slay it each and every day and motivate me to keep going. Thank you to the people that encourage me to keep going even though I can feel defeated at times,” she writes.
The mother offers her sympathies and encouragement to other working moms.
“I know that I am not the only working mom in the world, but I am a working mom and I totally understand what you are going through,” she shares. She empathizes with those who show up to work disorganized, exhausted, and stressed after having to leave their kids behind for the day.
“I understand that you are tired. Exhausted probably,” the mother says. “But I also understand that you are capable and worthy of so much more than you realize sometimes.”
“You don’t have to choose between two worlds that you love. You can have them both. You can have a family and a career. It’s not easy, but it is possible.” Johnson acknowledges the strength parents have when the two worlds collide and encourage them not to give up and keep moving forward.
Other working parents related to her words.
“I’m a full-time mom also, which means I have TWO full-time jobs. Coming home from work is just walking into another career,” one woman shared. “Like you, I’m just thankful that there are some people out here who have operated with grace over the years. Luckily, I think most people understand how chaotic having little kids can be.”
“Thank you so much for sharing! I struggle with benign a ‘good’ mom while balancing work as well,” another reader commented.
Others pointed out that even workers who are not parents also struggle with balancing work and everyday life.
“EVERYONE has a life to get home to — pets to feed/walk, elderly parents to check in on, volunteers work, exercise, hobbies, a second job, or even just recover from their day’s work,” one reader wrote.
“Having a child is a pain in the a–-. So is having depression or anxiety. So is having elderly parents. So is having a sick pet or significant other. So is living paycheck to paycheck. So is chronic illness or pain. Everyone has their own set of struggles,” another shared.
Whether you’re a parent or not, it is important to have compassion and grace for your fellow workers who often feel as if they are living in two worlds at once.
Jamie Johnson's plea resonates deeply with many working moms.
Let's cultivate empathy and grace in our workplaces, especially for those juggling the demanding roles of parent and employee. She sheds light on the all-too-common struggle parents face while balancing career aspirations with the profound responsibilities of parenthood.
Behind many rushed exits or distracted moments at work lies a parent grappling with the weight of leaving their little ones behind.
As Johnson expresses gratitude for the colleagues and bosses who've extended kindness and accommodation, her message reverberates beyond her own experience. It speaks to a universal truth: Due to the hectic pace of our lives, compassion and support are invaluable currencies.
To all the working parents who relate to Johnson's words, know that you're not alone. Your exhaustion, your moments of disorganization, and your occasional frayed edges are understood and valid.
And to those who may not be parents themselves, this mom’s story serves a gentle nudge towards empathy for the diverse struggles we all face. Whether it's caring for a sick pet, supporting aging parents, or battling personal demons, we're all fighting battles our colleagues may not realize.
Let's foster workplaces filled with compassion and understanding. Let's create environments where the inherent tension between work and family is met with grace, where individuals are empowered to thrive in all parts of their lives. It’s through acts of kindness and solidarity that we forge stronger, more resilient communities, both within and beyond the office walls.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.