Woman Says Her Husband Decides What Nails She Should Get & Urges Other Women To Do The Same
For one couple, manicures hold a different meaning in their relationship.
TikTok A woman on TikTok explained a newfound interest she and her husband uncovered in their relationship, and she suggested that other women explore the dynamic in their own relationships.
Tori Parker said her husband decides what nails she should get and recommended that other women do the same.
“Okay, I don’t know why it took me so long to get on this train, but I am here. This is for the girls whose partners pay for their nails and also pick out their nails — I get it, I get it now!” She exclaimed.
“To be fair though, my husband pretty much pays for everything, I am a stay-at-home mother,” Parker clarified. “I only make money on this little clock app and so I contribute very minimally financially, but you know, his money is our money.”
Parker inadvertently raises the issue of caregiving as a form of uncompensated labor. While she doesn’t speak to it directly, there are larger implications to the fact that most primary caregivers in the US are women and that moms aren’t paid for the work they do each day. But Parker isn’t making a statement about the gendered division of labor, she’s talking about something specific to her and her husband — their shared interest in having him decide how she gets her nails done.
Parker stated, “It’s weirdly important to me that my nails are done. For some reason, I feel like I’m a little more presentable when they are that way. Anyway, so, like, the last time I went before this time, he pulled out pictures, said, ‘I want you to have these’ and I did not even hesitate. That woke up my lady bits, I was like ‘Yes, I will put whatever you want on my hands, just ‘cause you wanna look at it, yes, okay.’”
While one could make the argument that physical appearance and how someone chooses to present is a very personal decision, one that shouldn’t necessarily be based on anyone else’s projected image, it appears that Parker and her husband have found a ritual that suits both their interests. There’s something to be said about the importance of basing your self-worth in a place that’s separate from other people’s ideal version of who you’re supposed to be, but if this manicure situation works for Parker and her husband, more power to them.
Parker explained that her husband deciding on her nail design makes them feel physically connected.
She continued, saying “He just went today and made an appointment for me, told me that this was my appointment, then brought out a picture and said, ‘I want you to have these,’ and boom, they’re awake again. All of my lady bits are awake.”
From an outside perspective, the dynamic that Parker and her husband have established around manicures appears to be a form of experimentation with Dominant/submissive role-play. Parker even used the hashtag "#kinktok" on her post. As author Meg-John Barker explains, "Dominant/submissive" relationships are “one aspect of the wider category of BDSM (Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, and Sadomasochism), sometimes also known as kink… In D/s activities one person generally dominates the other, or has power over them, therefore people tend to prefer D/s if they find a power dynamic to be exciting in some way. ”
While no one but Parker and her husband can define what they want from their relationship, and it’s certainly no one’s place to judge what they like, Parker’s explanation of how she feels when her husband picks out her nails reads as two people playing around with power dynamics, in the form of nail art.
“He picked these out — I’ve got disco ball fingers,” Parker said as showed off her sparkling silver nails. “Anyway, I get it. I don’t know why I get it, but I get it.”
Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team. She covers celebrity gossip, pop culture analysis and all things to do with the entertainment industry.