Single Mom Says Her Boyfriend's Reaction To Their Baby's Gender Was A 'Clear Message' The Relationship Was Doomed
His reaction to their baby's gender foreshadowed their breakup.
TikTok For expectant parents, finding out the baby's gender is supposed to be one of the most exciting times during a pregnancy.
While it's normal for parents to have conflicted feelings when they find out their baby's gender and it may not be what they anticipated, one expectant mother didn't appreciate the way her partner behaved during their gender reveal.
A single mom says her boyfriend's reaction to their baby's gender was a 'clear message.'
In a TikTok video, a mother shared the video that captured her and her boyfriend's reaction to the gender of their baby. The two of them were recorded each holding a gender reveal smoke bomb, and after turning them, pink smoke flew out, showing that they were going to be having a baby girl.
The mother's reaction was ecstatic, as she jumped around for joy, while her boyfriend looked visibly disappointed. He threw his head back in annoyance and walked off camera, while his girlfriend continued to celebrate on her own.
"Girl, you deserve better," she wrote about her past self in overlay text. "Yeah, I know."
In the video's caption, the young mother, who is now raising her daughter as a single mom, continued, "The best revenge is doing better without them and making them miss you, although I do miss who you were before I got pregnant..."
In the second part of the video, she wrote that she had been "crushed" by her partner's reaction. As he walked off following the gender reveal of their baby, though, her mother immediately ran into the frame, jumping around and hugging her daughter, showing off her own excitement.
While she had been disappointed in her boyfriend's dismissal of the entire event, her mood was promptly lifted as her family embraced her.
"Looking back on these videos, the universe sent me a CLEAR message," she wrote in the caption of the second video.
While it can be hard to understand, experiencing gender disappointment as a parent is common.
In the comments section of her video, many TikTok users expressed their thoughts on her boyfriend being heavily disappointed about having a daughter.
"His loss and your daughter will fill any void he ever created in you," one user wrote, while another added, "the fact that he walked away just says a lot."
While his reaction definitely wasn't the best outcome, experiencing gender disappointment is common.
According to Dr. Bronwyn Leigh, a Clinical Psychologist and Director of the Centre for Perinatal Psychology, "For some people, they create quite complex, rich fantasies about themselves as a parent and about how family life will look and be."
“If there is [a] significant investment in that fantasy and there is not a lot of flexibility, then that can really set people up to have gender disappointment.”
These types of feelings and reactions are normal, but the "unintended consequence" of gender disappointment can greatly damage a parent and child relationship.
"If a parent with gender disappointment is unable to bracket off their feelings while they are being with their baby, it may well impact their interactions,” Leigh continued. “Babies need parents who are physically and emotionally available, who are attuned to their needs, sensitively meeting their needs and [have] a capacity to delight in them."
Nia Tipton is a writer living in Brooklyn. She covers pop culture, social justice issues, and trending topics.