Man Asks Women If They Would Have A 'Negative' Reaction To Their Partner's Asking For Paternity Tests
Why would a man ask in the first place?
Monkey Business Images / Shutterstock In a post-Maury world, it may seem like asking for a paternity test is like assigning a death sentence to any long-form committed relationship you might have, but one man begs the question to figure out if that’s really the case.
On the subreddit “r/TwoXChromosomes,” where conversations are specifically tailored to expand on women’s perspectives, a man asked for women’s opinions on the matter.
He asked if women would have a ‘negative’ reaction to their partner’s asking for a paternity test.
“Saw a post on social media that's ruffling feathers,” he started the post. “It said, ‘As a woman you should not be angry if your husband asks for a paternity test at birth.’”
“Honestly, I disagree, because a paternity test is there to confirm who the father of the child is, which means there is doubt somewhere along the line.”
He’s of the mind that if a man is asking you for a paternity test, then they are likely operating under the assumption that you would be unfaithful to them in your relationship.
“Women don't waltz and get pregnant by just anybody, especially in these trying times,” as he put it.
However, he did also note that he believes men are completely entitled to want a paternity test if they choose so, “they just need to accept the reaction that they will get from their partner.”
The processes of being pregnant and giving birth are life-altering things and could produce life-threatening complications, so if a woman doesn’t feel that her husband trusts her enough to be faithful, she has every right not to go through with it.
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Many women answered that they would take offense to a paternity test request.
“They certainly have the right to do so,” wrote the top comment, “and in some cases, it's a very good idea in a more casual relationship especially, but I also know I would have been deeply offended if my partner had asked for one.”
They continued, explaining that trust is one of the most important aspects of any relationship and that it would be a very clear statement that it may be fractured or is being called into question.
Some women explained that there are some extenuating circumstances in which they would be able to understand why a man would ask for a paternity test without taking offense.
One woman explained that she and her partner had gotten artificial insemination in order to conceive their children and that her husband was worried about a lab mixup.
“It is super embarrassing having him ask the doctors about getting one. I think they assume he is accusing me of cheating,” she explained. “In these circumstances, I wish that he didn't need one but I'm not offended.”
Other circumstances in which some people deemed it acceptable were if his partner had a history of infidelity, if the couple was actively using contraception, and if it were a very new couple that hadn’t talked about being in an exclusive relationship.
One interesting opinion that was brought up a small number of times was that both parents should actually always get paternity tests.
The reason being? The baby could have been swapped at birth by the hospital.
In order to ensure that the baby you received at the hospital is actually yours, you should always get a paternity test because no one wants a small human error to get in the way of raising your biological child.
If you’re a man, and your situation doesn’t fall under any one of these categories, expect your partner to take offense to the implications of your question.
Isaac Serna-Diez is an Assistant Editor who focuses on entertainment and news, social justice, and politics. Keep up with his rants about current events on his Twitter.