Woman's Boyfriend Destroys Their House After She Asked Him To Be Quiet While Gaming So She Could Work From Home
His unhinged & violent response to a simple request had many people waving red flags.
@itsgoneviral, @laurenfortheocean / TikTok Working from home is not without its problems, what with all the distractions we all have around our homes.
But one TikToker recently faced a whole other kind of challenge with her work-from-home set-up — her incredibly toxic boyfriend.
Her situation has left people online in shock after she revealed what her boyfriend did to their home after she asked him to quiet down so she could work.
Like many people, Lauren Kucharski, known as @laurenfortheocean on TikTok, has a boyfriend who is an avid gamer.
And he's the type who gets very vocal when gaming — which is obviously not great when someone is trying to have meetings over Zoom.
Most of us probably wouldn't think twice about being asked to quiet down under these circumstances, but Kucharski's boyfriend seems to be built very differently.
People are calling her boyfriend abusive after he destroyed their home in response to being asked to quiet down his gaming.
Kucharski's original video was removed from TikTok, presumably because it depicts what has struck many as an act of domestic violence.
But it has been reposted by other accounts and has gone viral since the incident first occurred back in December, and what it shows is nothing short of shocking.
Kucharski's apartment is essentially destroyed.
Objects are smashed and scattered everywhere.
Broken furniture is strewn around the space.
And perhaps most shocking, Kurcharski's boyfriend had busted two holes and cut a gash into a door — in the shape of a mocking frowny face.
Kucharski claims that his violent outburst came after she disconnected his gaming set-up from the WiFi because he ignored her requests to be quiet.
Kucharski narrated the altercation as she showed off her boyfriend's destruction, and it only makes her boyfriend's reaction seem more unhinged—and dangerously abusive.
She says that she asked him nicely "a couple of times" to quiet down because she "can't have people hearing him yelling and screaming and cussing while [I'm] on the phone."
After being ignored, Kucharski said she had "just fu-king had enough" and was "sick of asking him to respect [me] while [I'm] working," leading her to disconnect him from the wifi.
This led to her boyfriend deciding to "smash all of his gaming stuff and destroy the walls and then blame it on me for ruining his birthday."
TikTok users felt there was no debate — she was in a domestic violence situation and needs to get away from her boyfriend before his abuse escalates.
Many users recognized signs of an abusive relationship in Kucharski's video.
One user urged Kucharski to "pack your things and get far away from there!" while another was more direct — "Girl. Run."
Others were disturbed by how little sense the boyfriend's behavior made.
As one user put it, "smashing up the very gaming equipment that was so important to him 5 mins ago is a huge red flag to me. that overraction is very worrying."
And several urged her to take legal action.
"Lawyer up," one wrote, while another urged, "he won’t change. Press charges."
Kucharski posted a follow-up detailing how she had dealt with her boyfriend's abuse and let her followers know that she had broken up with him.
"We have broken up," Kucharski said. "That was the moment we broke up. He is my ex," she went on to say, emphasizing the word "ex."
"I'm safe, I've broken free, the rose-colored glasses have been taken off, and... ever since then I have significantly improved my mental health."
Kucharski also struggles with substance abuse and announced that she is also six weeks sober since getting away from her abusive boyfriend.
And she's kept a sense of humor about the whole thing, despite the harrowing circumstances.
In a second follow-up, Kucharski filmed the frowny-face-shaped holes again and provided an update on this "really, really sad closet door that I've got."
"She does talk to me at night sometimes in my dreams," Kucharski joked about the wall damage.
Experts say the way she handled her situation is precisely what people need to do in order to get out of abusive or controlling relationships, no matter what kind.
Los Angeles-based psychologist and psychoanalyst Dr. Sandra Cohen warns victims of intimate partner violence or abuse, "don't be fooled" when a violent partner apologizes and promises to "do better."
"He can’t [do better]," she writes. "He’s not in emotional control."
She says it's imperative to "determine strict boundaries for yourself...and stick to them" when leaving an abusive partner, because "once you hesitate, you’ve lost your footing."
Dr. Cohen also advises victims of abusive relationships to work toward setting up an emotional support system and accessing professional help in dealing with the trauma abusive relationships create.
Thankfully, Kucharski seems to have had good instincts about her former partner's outburst, and seems to be on a safe and positive trajectory.
If you’re experiencing domestic abuse, you’re not alone.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline reports that approximately 24 people per minute are victims of rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner in the U.S.
More than 12 million women and men over the course of the year suffer from instances of domestic violence and abuse.
Experiencing domestic abuse can happen to anyone and is not a reflection of who you are.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline defines domestic violence, domestic abuse, or relationship abuse as a “pattern of behaviors use by one partner to maintain power and control over another person in an intimate relationship.”
Anyone of any race, age, sexual orientation, religion, or gender can suffer from domestic abuse.
According to NDVH, close to 3 in 10 women and 1 in 10 men in the U.S. have experienced rape, physical violence, and or stalking by a partner.
If you or someone you know is suffering from domestic abuse or violence, there are resources to get help.
There are ways to go about asking for help as safely as possible. For more information, resources, legal advice, and relevant links visit the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
For anyone struggling with domestic abuse, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
If you’re unable to speak safely, text LOVEIS to 1-866-331-9474 or log onto thehotline.org.
John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice and human interest topics.