A Dad Refuses To Take His Screaming Child Outside During A Grocery Store Meltdown & Gets Praised
A screaming child in public is just as much of a battle for the parent to handle.
TikTok Dealing with toddler tantrums and baby meltdowns can be exhausting to deal with as a parent — especially if you happen to be in public.
It can often be hard trying to ignore all of the judgmental stares from passersby while also attempting to calm your child down as they're having a full-blown tantrum in a public place. However, one father, Owen Squires explained that it shouldn't be a parents' fault when their child is having a difficult time, and instead, we should all be a bit more sensitive.
He shared that he refuses to remove his screaming child from the grocery store if they are having a tantrum.
"If my child is ever crying at the grocery store, I am not removing them from the grocery store and I'm sorry if that makes you mildly uncomfortable or brings out the controlling part of your personality but it is not illegal for a child to have feelings," Squires declared in his video.
He continued, explaining that one of the main reasons why parents can be extremely critical of their kids and will often grow impatient with them or resort to physically hitting them is because they feel the pressure from a society that regularly shows impatience towards them.
Especially in public settings, where parents are not allowed to have limited privacy and personal space to attend to their baby's needs. This can make it challenging to soothe the baby or address the underlying cause of their distress. Squires's daughter is a regular star in his TikToks and is at an age where she's still learning to be comfortable in new environments.
Photo: TikTok
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Squires revealed that a similar situation had happened to him after he and his wife had gone to the grocery store with their children. "My 3-year-old was having a meltdown," he recalled. "We were there during her naptime and she didn't want to be there but it's like we need groceries."
During his daughter's tantrum in the store, he and his wife, who both practice gentle parenting, were trying their hardest to calm her down, but Squires could feel all of the stares from the other people in the grocery store.
"I look around and it's like a goddamn car wreck, all eyeballs are on us," he said. "Now I can feel my anxiety level rising. I can feel my anger level rising like now this is affecting my ego. Everybody is looking at me and judging me for how my child is behaving."
Squires pointed out that now, with all of those feelings, he feels anger toward his child for putting him in such an awkward and embarrassing situation, when in reality, he should be calming his daughter down because she's only a child and just doing what normal children do — cry.
Squires encouraged people to be more sympathetic toward children and parents alike.
"As a parent, you constantly feel like people are judging you for your child's behavior," he remarked, adding that it's usually because people are judging, especially when they feel a parent can't control their kids in public.
He acknowledged that because parents often feel backed into a corner by the judgmental attitudes of other people, they immediately turn to use violence to tamper down their child's tantrums, which doesn't help the situation at all, and instead only makes it worse.
"I think there would be a lot more parents willing to be patient with their children if society could just relax and be a little more accepting of children and the fact that they're not always sunshine and rainbows," he stressed.
Certified parenting coach Rachael Lynn Rogers also echoed a similar sentiment in a video she posted to her TikTok account about how she handles her daughter's tantrums when they're in public.
Rogers admitted that despite feeling the eyes of strangers on her when her daughter was having a terrible meltdown in a crowded restaurant, she made sure not to pay attention to them, but rather keep her focus on her daughter so she could calm her down.
"I had to train myself to not focus on the thoughts, feelings, and opinions of other people, but instead to focus on my child and what need is driving her unwanted behaviors,” Rogers said.
In the comments section, people praised Squires for his approach to dealing with his child's tantrums.
"We’re so conditioned to make other adults comfortable. We’re teaching little people how to people.. it should be a community effort," one TikTok user wrote.
Another user added that they've started trying to offer assistance to parents dealing with tantrums in public. "I try to go out of my way to say something nice to parents in this situation (not in the heat of the moment, but after). They need encouragement too."
"When I hear a meltdown happening, in public, I do NOT look or stare. The last thing any parent needs in that moment is any extra eyes on them," a third user pointed out.
Society needs to recognize that babies cry as a means of communication, and it is a normal part of their development. Supporting parents and offering empathy rather than judgment can help create a more inclusive and understanding environment for everyone.
Nia Tipton is a Brooklyn-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.