100 Ways To Be A Great Husband Every Wife Wishes She Had
These simple romantic ideas can make any wife happy.
Justin Buisson | Unsplash It sounds a bit cliché, but the little things make a man into a great husband every wife wishes she had. Grand romantic gestures have their time and place, sure, but it’s the small, sweet ones that mean the most. It's all about those cute-just-because things you do to show your girlfriend or wife that you don’t take her for granted or that make the hectic world you inhabit together a little bit more calm.
Those caring actions are the ones that add up in the long run. Some are simple; others take a bit more planning and self-reflection — and all will make a big difference in keeping your relationship happy and strong.
Here are 100 ways to a husband every wife wishes she had:
1. Put her morning coffee in a thermos for her
This is a thoughtful gesture, allowing her to enjoy a warm cup of coffee even when she's away from home. By taking the time to understand her coffee preferences and make them right, the husband shows that he pays attention to her needs and wants to create a small moment of shared intimacy.
2. Tell her good morning, and tell her goodnight
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This signifies a conscious effort to maintain connection, foster positive feelings, and reinforce a sense of intimacy within the relationship. It acts as a small but meaningful gesture that contributes to the overall relationship's well-being by signaling that she is on his mind throughout the day and that he cares about her well-being.
3. Hold her hand when you're walking down the street together
A sign of affection, commitment, intimacy, and a desire to publicly display their bond, often conveying a sense of security and closeness between the couple. Some people are naturally more tactile than others and may express affection more readily through physical touch like hand-holding.
4. Write or draw something silly for her on a Post-It note
Stick it to the fridge or the door or the bathroom mirror — wherever she’s likely to see it and laugh. Leaving silly notes can be interpreted as a tactic to express affection, maintain connection, and foster a positive emotional environment within the relationship. It often stems from a desire to make his partner feel appreciated, loved, and valued, even in small gestures.
5. Buy her flowers on literally any day that isn’t Valentine’s Day, your anniversary, or her birthday
This is generally interpreted as a gesture of affection, appreciation, and a desire to make her feel special and loved. It signifies a thoughtful act that goes beyond a routine gesture and expresses a deeper level of care and connection in the relationship. It's a way to brighten her day and show that he is thinking about her without any specific reason.
6. Make plans to do the things she used to love to do before you had kids
Make plans to do that thing. A strong connection built over time that allows him to pick up on subtle cues and remember details about her past interests and passions. When a husband remembers and acknowledges his wife's past interests, it can be seen as a gesture of care and attentiveness, strengthening the bond and promoting emotional intimacy.
7. Don’t bother her when she’s reading
This usually means he respects her need for quiet time and solitude while immersed in a book. He allows her to focus without interruption, which is generally considered a positive aspect of a healthy relationship.
8. Buy the good soap
This can be primarily driven by a desire to express love and care, foster intimacy, strengthen the relationship, and enhance his wife's happiness. It often stems from positive reinforcement, social approval, and a need for connection within the partnership.
9. Clean the windows
This can involve contributing to the household, demonstrating care and responsibility towards his partner, boosting his self-esteem, and even signifying a more equitable division of household chores. However, the specific motivations can vary depending on individual personalities and cultural norms.
10. If it's cold out warm her car up before work
Is it hot? Get that A/C going. She doesn’t drive to work? Buy her one of those mini fans or, if you think she’d use it, a hand fan. When a husband warms up his wife's car in cold weather, it can be interpreted as a gesture of care, attentiveness, and a desire to provide comfort and convenience.
This often stems from factors like wanting to show affection, demonstrating a sense of responsibility for his partner's well-being, and potentially even a subtle power dynamic where he takes initiative to anticipate her needs.
11. Let her sleep in
Sharing a bed and allowing extra sleep can demonstrate closeness and emotional support, especially when it's not expected or is done during a particularly demanding time for the wife. Depending on the couple's dynamics, the wife might feel neglected or like her needs are not being met if the husband consistently lets her sleep in without any communication or other gestures of affection.
12. Make lunch for her
Preparing a meal can be seen as a thoughtful act of love, showing that the husband is paying attention to his wife's needs and wants to improve her day. For some husbands, cooking for their wives can be a source of personal satisfaction, allowing them to express their creativity and nurturing side.
13. Watch the movie she wants to see
If you didn’t enjoy it and she did, keep the extent of your opinion to yourself. This can involve a mix of positive motivations, such as wanting to please her, strengthening their bond, showing support, and sometimes even a desire to better understand her interests.
However, it can also be influenced by factors like feeling obligated, avoiding conflict, or simply wanting to spend quality time together, even if the movie isn't his preferred choice.
14. Have some favorite dresses or shirts or shoes that she wears and comment on them repeatedly until they’re special
Let her know you genuinely like the way she looks in the outfit. If possible, relate the piece of clothing to something about her style or character.
15. Tell her you love the way she laughs
Laughter is good medicine — backed up by research. Keeping a sense of humor in marriage can see you through the difficult seasons that are bound to come. Learning to laugh despite your situation will keep you grounded.
16. Wash the towels and bath mat
Especially the bath mat. This is a positive action, indicating that the husband contributes to household chores and takes responsibility for bathroom upkeep. This is one of the most unloved household chores, so your husband taking the initiative to get it done, speaks volumes.
17. Throw her robe in the dryer for a few minutes so it’s warm when she puts it on
There's nothing quite like wrapping yourself in a warm, cozy towel after a shower or bath. If you don't have one of those fancy towel warmers, use your dryer to provide this luxurious experience whenever she steps out of the water.
18. Buy some good lotion and rub her back or feet or whatever aches
Make it a whole thing, not a short massage. Don’t be weird about it. And don’t expect a massage in return. This act of physical touch can be a way to express affection and deepen intimacy within a relationship. The process can be a way for partners to communicate their needs and preferences regarding touch and pressure.
19. Wear an outfit she loves
Even if it’s the one with the collared shirt underneath the sweater that makes you look like the guy who always gets broken up with in movies. This could lead to compliments, increased intimacy, and feeling appreciated by your wife. It can be a subtle way of expressing affection and showing that you pay attention to her preferences.
20. Tell her you were thinking about her during the day
This is a simple but meaningful way to reaffirm your love and commitment to her. Sharing this thought demonstrates emotional intimacy, letting her know you have her in mind throughout the day.
21. Vacuum under the couch cushions
And under the couch while you're at it. It suggests a husband is thoroughly cleaning a typically neglected couch area. This action could be a sign of you taking on household responsibilities.
22. When you come home, say, “There’s my beautiful bride!”
The loud welcome is usually a sign of genuine affection and excitement to see his wife after she's been away. Depending on your dynamic, it could be a playful gesture or a way to show extra care after a particularly stressful day for her.
23. Fix that thing you know needs to be fixed
Don't wait for her to complain or become frustrated. Anticipate the problem and take action to fix it. If she seems stressed about work, you might plan a relaxing evening for her without being asked.
24. Make her favorite dinner
It's considered a thoughtful act, taking the time to find and cook her favorite dish, showing he cares about her desires. To ensure it's her favorite, ask her directly or remember what she previously mentioned as her go-to meal.
25. Clean the bathroom sink
Chores are shared responsibilities, and dividing up the housework well is essential to a happy marriage. Tasks don't need to be divided perfectly down the middle, but it is necessary that each person feels that the tasks are shared.
26. Initiate contact
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A hug, a hand on the lower back, a light squeeze of the rump if the moment is right. Doesn’t need to be a big thing, but it can.
27. Make sure her electronics are charged or charging
This is generally considered normal and acceptable behavior in a marriage, as long as it is not suspicious or intrusive and both partners mutually understand that they must respect each other's privacy on their devices. If there are any privacy concerns, open communication between partners is essential to address any anxieties and establish clear boundaries regarding device access.
28. Help her make battle plans at work
We are driven to support each other, and it took me a good while to understand this, even with the disparity in your work environments. You’re a battlefield advisor but not the boots on the ground. Avoid being overbearing.
29. Cultivate habits so that you’re slightly predictable
People find this reassuring. Habits significantly strengthen relationships by fostering trust, understanding, and a sense of connection between partners. They essentially build a foundation for a healthy and fulfilling relationship.
30. Remind her she doesn’t have to be everything to everyone
You want her to prioritize her well-being and not feel pressured to constantly fulfill the needs of others, including extended family, friends, or even work colleagues, at the expense of her happiness and needs within the relationship. Help her consider if you are taking on too much responsibility and if there are areas where you can delegate or say no.
31. Dress like an adult
32. Turn the heat up higher than you want to, because she’s probably cold
33. Ask her how her day was
Have at least one good follow-up question so it at least sounds like you’re listening. Better yet, really listen.
34. Give her the aux cord in the car (or control of the headphones you’re sharing on the commute)
So what, she’s just going to play early 2000s emo from her phone? You’ll live.
35. Even if you’ve stream-cheated and watched ahead on that Cool Show You’re Both Into, don’t tell her and just enjoy the re-watch.
36. Have other friends
Hang out with them sometimes.
37. Do that one chore she hates doing
And don’t make a big deal about the fact you did it.
38. Put toothpaste on her toothbrush if you’re both getting ready around the same time.
39. Suck it up and spoon her
40. Try — really try — to make her laugh
41. Play hooky with her
42. Pick up her favorite Starbucks order just because
Even if it’s one of those five hyphenate, hyper-specific orders.
43. Talk with her daily about what’s going on in the world
She’s already heard the news, but she might need someone to vent her fears and anger to.
44. Hug her for at least 30 seconds
45. Randomly send her a GIF or selfie or funny photo of the kids eating
46. Bring her a cup of water in the morning
Or before bed. Or just after intimacy. Don’t wait to be asked.
47. When you text her, use emojis
Try: heart eyes, smiley face with tongue hanging out, kissy face, waving hand, peach, eggplant, and blushing face.
48. Tell her she’s a great mother
Be specific. Try: “Watching you bathe the kids earlier made me realize what a wonderful mom you are.”
49. kiss her as soon as you walk in the door
Or, if you work from home, head to her for a kiss when she enters.
50. Tell her she’s attractive
You are the person she wants to hear this from most.
51. Pick up the snack cookie or ice cream she likes but never buys for herself
Even if it’s a tub of cheese balls.
52. Come up with a silly new pet name or nickname for her
53. Read a book solely because you know she loved it
Talk to her about it when you’re done.
54. Let her talk about whoever or whatever she wants without judgment
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55. Next time she tells you a story she’s already told you a thousand times, pretend like it’s the first time she’s told it
56. Apologize for something stupid you’ve done
This should be a real apology where you admit you’re wrong. Don’t do it for brownie points. Instead, do it to show you respect her enough to swallow your ego.
57. Gush about her in front of her friends
58. Out of nowhere, tell a story about when you guys first met or when you first knew you liked her
Be specific.
59. Tell her a way that she’s grown in the past year that’s impressed you a lot
Maybe something she’s overcome or an old habit she’s shaken.
60. Bring her coffee to bed
Make it the way she likes. If she likes it stronger than you like it? Make it strong.
61. Kiss her when she wakes up
62. Give up the good pillow
63. While we’re at it, get rid of your old pillows
64. Play with her hair
65. Make up a stupid song
Answer her in a weird voice. Bust out a funky dance. Just be super silly.
66. Tell her you’re proud of her
67. Go to bed when she does when you don’t want to
Especially when you don’t want to.
68. Make more space in the closets for her
All of them.
69. Leave her a voicemail — yes a voicemail, not a text
Tell her you were thinking about her.
70. Admit something that scares you
Or tell her a moment when you felt happy/excited/sad for someone else during the day. Allow yourself to be vulnerable.
71. Wear the right size clothing
72. Keep your beard trimmed
73. Wear the cologne she likes, even if you’re not a cologne guy
74. Sign her up for that class she’s always wanted to take
75. Ask how one of her old friends is
Tell her she should give her a call and catch up. Encourage her to maintain her relationships.
76. Put your phone on do not disturb mode for the night
77. Add a few small, sweet items on her Google calendar for the week ahead
Think: “90-minute massage at her favorite spa."
78. Change the oil in her car
79. Draw her a bath
Then leave her to enjoy it alone,
80. Get a morning babysitter for a few hours and go out on a breakfast date
81. Take the day’s first feeding
82. Use the fabric softener
83. Notice when she goes out of your way to do something nice for you
Don’t say, “Oh, you didn’t need to do that.” Say: “Thank you.” Be appreciative.
84. Accept her help when she wants to cook with you
It’s probably not that she thinks you’re bad at it. It’s that she wants to do something with you.
85. Show up
To that work thing. To the drinks thing. To the thing at the friend’s house that she was looking forward to even though the husband there is a bit of a stiff and you know you’ll get bored talking about his new grill.
86. Let her have the last piece of bacon, the last French fry, or whatever final food is there that she wants
87. Don’t say 'fine' when she asks you how she looks
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Tell her you love the color of her dress or what she did with her hair.
88. Cuddle with her on the couch
89. Light a ridiculous amount of candles
90. Throw out that ugly pair of shoes (or jeans or cargo shorts) you love but she hates
Toss the tattered undies, too.
91. Without being prompted, tag her in a flattering photo of you guys or your kids if she’s into social media
92. Open up a nice, special-occasion bottle of wine for no reason
93. Wear the shirt in your closet she likes the most
94. Randomly pull out some old photos from when you were dating or newly married
Reminisce.
95. Frame a picture of her with the kids
Tell her why you love it.
96. Tell her how glad you are you married her.
97. Keep her company when she wants company
98. Go to the fancy grocery store for dinner stuff
Make a fancy dinner.
99. Put something sweet in her work bag
Could be chocolate. Could be a toy. Could be a silly drawing.
100. Just take the selfie if she wants to take a selfie
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