The Most Desirable Quality In A Partner, According To Research
The quality that's necessary for a relationship to last.
fizkes | Canva I have to admit, when I jumped head-first into my current relationship back in April, after only three weeks of texting each other, I didn't put much thought into exactly why I was attracted to my now-boyfriend. I mean, he's attractive, made me laugh, and didn't constantly smell like nachos like my last boyfriend, so that's enough for me. He doesn't judge me for my weird habit of eating pickles in bed.
However, thanks to science, I can confidently say that his non-aggressive nature and unlikeliness to harm me or my potential future offspring earned him major points. And they say romance is dead.
On that same note, he probably likes me for my youth and fertility. It's a tale as old as time, a man who isn't mean and a very fertile woman. No, we're not weirdos; we're just playful, and sometimes really competitive regarding trivia. The definitions — and the importance of playfulness in a relationship — come from a 2012 Penn State study on attraction.
The study found that the most desirable quality in a partner is playfulness.
Edward Eyer / Pexels
The researchers sought to further investigate a list of characteristics that people find desirable in potential mates, more specifically why some relationships last and others don't. Did you ever wonder why some people are attracted to the people they are, or why some people "have a type" when it comes to dating? Here's the science behind it.
To do so, they surveyed 164 male and 89 female undergraduates. From the results, they added "playful," "sense of humor" and "fun-loving" to the initial list. Make sure your future partner can laugh at themself and not take everything so seriously, it'll make for a much better future together.
Mark Alvin Mabayo / Pexels
Interestingly, something as seemingly obvious as a person's sense of humor wasn't included on the original desirable characteristics list, but at least it's on there now (just in case daters of the world need a checklist to bring on their next Tinder date, among the millions of other characteristics a man has to have that convinces you he's not a serial killer.).
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go do my "youth and fertility dance" for my boyfriend and make sure that I don't break eye contact this time (for the curious: I sing "You Don't Know You're Beautiful" into a shampoo bottle) so he doesn't forget how playful I am, and that I haven't been doing the dishes the past three weeks, or that I forgot it was his cousins birthday last week.
It's good to be playful with those who are more playful in their relationships, as research published in the Journal of Personal Relationships states that playful couples tend to experience more positive emotions, be more satisfied with their union, and feel closer to each other.
Kait Smith is an editor, writer, and social media manager, who writes on love and relationships.