9 Smooth Behaviors Of Men Who Consistently Win Women Over, According To Research
These guys check ALL the boxes.
Marcel Strauss | Unsplash In the competitive dating world, it’s not about having the perfect height or the highest salary — it's about mastering the smooth, research-backed behaviors that make a real difference. Despite popular myths and outdated advice, genuine attraction goes far beyond surface-level traits. In fact, studies show that women are drawn to men who exude confidence, authenticity, and respect in every interaction.
It's true that many great men get overlooked, often because they either stop putting themselves out there, find it challenging to connect with women, have bad luck, or haven't focused enough on their appearance to make a great first impression. Whether you're eager to improve your dating strategy or just want to discover what makes a man appealing, these tips can help enhance your dating experience and find meaningful relationships.
Here are 9 smooth behaviors of men who consistently win women over, according to research:
1. He makes her feel safe, but makes his intentions known
They don’t beat around the bush, claim to want friendship, and then flip out when their advances are rejected. They go, "Hey, I really like you. I want to get to know you better as a person. You’re super-attractive and cool."
2. He validates her feelings
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Women want to feel seen and heard. Nothing is more attractive than saying, "Hey, you’re right to feel that way. I wouldn’t be thrilled with that, either."
3. He's generous
I remember when I had a guy buy me a bottle of Moet, knowing I was a fan of champagne. I melted. It was a thoughtful gift I wouldn’t have been able to afford for myself.
A 2017 study concluded that men who display generosity experience numerous benefits, including increased happiness, stronger relationships, and enhanced personal and social well-being. Acts of generosity are most beneficial when genuine and motivated by empathy and compassion rather than a desire for external validation or control.
4. He enjoys himself
People want to be around people who are fun and who have fun. That’s why the guy at the club who is dancing and talking to everyone gets women interested in him.
5. He holds himself accountable
A guy women want to be with doesn’t blame others for his lot in life. He’s the guy who can clean up after himself, the guy who can earn a living, and the guy who realizes he messed up and is willing to own up to his mistakes.
6. He doesn't whine or trauma-dump on her
Nothing screams unattractive like the guy who should be seeing a shrink instead of a date. A romantic partner is not a rehab center for an unstable man.
Trauma dumping, or the act of offloading one's emotional burden onto another without regard for their emotional state, can be detrimental to both parties, leading to relationship strain and potentially re-traumatization or vicarious trauma. A 2020 study recommended protecting your mental health by limiting your exposure to trauma, dumping, and seeking support for yourself.
7. He takes time to get to know her
I will never understand how so many men have no problem talking dirty to a girl they just met. Like, don't you even want to try to put up a pretense of seeing them as a person? Oh, wait … Yeah, only attractive people do that.
8. He dresses well and has good hygiene
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If you want to see the kings of dressing for the female gaze, go to a goth club. As much as I hate the idea of being with goth guys these days, they know how to play up a cute vamp look.
Not your dig? Cool. Try K-pop stars, rappers, or basically any other type of guy that has a massive female following.
9. He doesn't mistreat her before or after they meet
Women talk. There are a lot of men who are blacklisted from various scenes because they either spiked a woman’s drink, talked badly about the wrong woman, hit someone, or shared private pictures. Eventually, this behavior can and will catch up to you.
If you didn’t notice, a lot of those traits fly in the face of the type of behavior that involves correcting women on what women want.
I’ve heard a lot of love stories in my life. I have yet to hear a woman tell me, "And then he interrupted me, talked over me, and told me I don’t know what I want. He then accused me of being interested in Chad over him, but then told me I’m not hot enough to get a Chad. I’m in love!"
Men's treatment of women is influenced by factors like traditional gender roles, empathy, and the desire to maintain dominance, but also by individual differences and relationship dynamics. According to a 2018 study, open communication and empathy-building can help foster healthier relationships and prevent misunderstandings.
No, most women don’t react well to men tone-policing them or "correcting" them about the nature of women. It’s repulsive, gaslight-y, and invalidates us as people. Moreover, it’s really misogynistic. It shows you really don’t care what women think.
There absolutely are blind spots that women have a hard time advising men on, including things like how to make a girl feel safe, how to deal with emotional blackmail, or where it’s appropriate to hit on women. However, knowing what women want is not one of those blind spots.
Dating is already a meat grinder. Do you really want to make it worse for yourself by listening to misogynistic advice about women wanting "Chads?" I sure hope not.
Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer whose work has been featured in Yahoo, BRIDES, Your Daily Dish, Newtheory Magazine, and others.