10 Small Things Every Man Secretly Hopes His Partner Will Do For Him

When it comes to relationships, there's no denying that men have secret hopes for what their partners will be like.

Just like a savings account, you start by making a deposit. If you continue to make deposits, your savings account grows. If you only make one deposit, your savings account doesn't grow. Apply that concept to your relationship.

This doesn't mean keeping score; rather, it means working toward building a positive perspective in your relationship. Building these emotional deposits with your partner is exactly what most men are looking for when asked what they want more from their partner.

Here are 10 small things every man secretly wants his partner to do for him

1. Listen to the little things

woman listening lovingly to partner Ketut Subiyanto / Pexels

There are only a couple of minutes in a relationship where you build trust and learn how to keep it.

For example, you come home after a long day at work and your partner wants to talk to you about the children. You can simply say, "I'm tired," and walk away — or you can stay and listen to your partner.

This may not make a huge difference at the time but, in the long run, it will. Men want to know that they are heard, and lending an ear for even a few minutes is important.

2. Make an effort to be positive

couple being positive making breakfast Ba Tik / Pexels

The small things can make a world of difference. And the best part is that your partner will certainly notice, especially when you make even the tiniest effort to see things in a positive light.

When your partner hears you making that effort, they will smile. Remember, it's not always what you say — it's how you say it that really matters.

3. Don't criticize

couple relaxing on couch with dog Andres Ayrton / Pexels

Learn to have a discussion about your problems, rather than immediately criticizing your partner. Don't get defensive; instead, take a beat and see the situation from another point of view.

Men really want their partner to accept responsibility when necessary and control their defensive behavior. Doing so will only make your relationship stronger.

4. Tell him how much you love and appreciate him

woman telling man she appreciates him SHVETS production / Pexels

Regardless of your love language, everyone needs to hear this every now and then from their partner. When you tell your partner how much they mean to you, it does wonders for strengthening your bond.

No one ever gets sick of someone telling them they love them or how much they appreciate them. The more specific you can be, the better.

5. Take care of yourself

woman relaxing practicing self-care Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels

This means getting plenty of rest, making good food choices, and exercising regularly. Take breaks during the day and don't be too hard on yourself.

It's true that we need to take care of ourselves before we can take care of others. So make a point to take excellent care of your physical and mental health.

6. Be empathetic

couple by the water with woman being empathetic Elle Hughes / Pexels

Don't just listen to your partner — listen to your partner with empathy, particularly when they share a stressful event that happened, whether it was at work or any time during their busy day.

When you respond with compassion, your partner will feel like you really care about them.

7. Accept influence from your partner

couple with suitcase walking side by side Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels

Part of being in a relationship involves opening your mind to new experiences and hobbies that you may not enjoy, but your partner does. Accept that you will need to do things your partner likes, not just what you like.

Try out your partner's ideas with enthusiasm, as it's really good for your relationship. It also keeps the relationship on equal ground.

8. Manage your phone time

couple laying in bed on phones Ketut Subiyanto / Pexels

The next time you have dinner together, leave your phone and other gadgets behind. It's not only rude to be on your phone the entire meal, but it detracts from building a stronger bond.

Instead, spend time talking to one another. Ask questions and take a genuine interest in what your partner has to say. Your phone will always be there afterwards.

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9. Be willing to work on your relationship

loving couple arms around each other working on their relationship Josh Willink / Pexels

All relationships go through highs and lows. This is to be expected. But the most essential part of making sure a relationship stays afloat is putting in the work every single day.

Try and work things out rather than throwing in the towel. Don't jump to conclusions. It's alright to agree to disagree.

10. Support his dreams

man playing guitar for female partner Pavel Danilyuk / Pexels

It's easy to forget about your dreams when you're in a relationship. Work, the house, and the children tend to take over your time and energy.

But pay attention to what your partner's dreams and ambitions are. Then, tell him what your dreams are. Maybe you want to take a night class or travel to an exotic place.

Your dreams don't have to be the same, but you do need to be supportive of them.

Just as it's never too late to deposit into your savings account, it's never too late to deposit into your emotional bank account. So, start today. This will help rebuild the friendship, which is the foundation of your relationship.

Lianne Avila is a licensed marriage and family therapist with a practice in San Mateo, CA. Her work has been featured in Psych Central, BRIDES, and Prevention.