If These 12 Signs Hit Home, You’re Burned Out By Love And Need To Take A Break
Desire for love can't run on fumes.
nikkimeel | Canva If there’s one thing I’m very well acquainted with, it’s having love burnout. It’s that point where your entire mind, body, and soul are all begging you to stop trying to find Mr. Right.
Love burnout is real, and if you’re dealing with it, you need to stop dating people. If you are dealing with any of these signs, stop talking to people on Tinder. You’re burned out on love to the point of extra crispy and you’re not helping yourself look good.
If these signs hit home, you're burned out by love and need to take a break:
1. You want to fly into a rage when you see a happy couple
You start screaming whenever you see a happy couple, a wedding ad, or a text rejecting you. It sucks, I know. Love sucks because it’s some sort of weird, rare thing we’re told will happen to us within a certain timeframe, and it doesn’t always happen. I know this feeling, so trust me, you’re not alone. It happens. When it happens, you need to stop trying.
2. You would condone abuse just to be with someone
Songsak C via Shutterstock
Yes, this can happen to people out there and I’ve personally witnessed it happening. Unless you are okay with ending up in a body bag or ending up alone with worse health, you’ll avoid this.
A study from The American Psychological Association found that "being emotionally abused was a life journey, encompassing multiple culminations, secondary physical and mental health symptoms, and quality of life issues that extended well beyond the immediate abuse experience."
3. You sneer when you hear about other relationships
If you’ve ever had to fight the urge to go, “Yeah, pfft, sure he’s good,” you have a serious case of burnout. You can’t be that cynical and expect good things to happen in your love life.
4. You are exhausted by the idea of going on a date
When you’re burned out on love, the things that once got you excited to wake up in the morning turn into frustrating, aggravating chores. If you have to talk yourself into swiping right, you’re fried to a crisp.
5. You've lost interest in going out with friends
This is different if you’re an introvert. But if you’re an extrovert and you no longer want to hang out, it may be a sign that your hopeless vibe in dating has spread to other parts of your life. Misery is contagious, you know.
6. You are jealous of other couples
Oh, sweetie. If you’re jealous of other couples and are trying to break up other relationships, you have a lot more issues than dating burnout going on. You’re dealing with some seriously messed up ways of coping with the hurt.
7. You are so desperate you’ll date anyone
Prostock-studio via Shutterstock
I have been there. This is a great, wonderful way to lose money, time, and sanity. It’s also a great way to have people lose respect for you, even though what you want isn’t that insane.
8. You hear people say you need to take a break
By the time people get to the point that they pull you aside to talk to you, you have a major problem and you’ve probably made a major scene. I’ve been there too and I know how bad that is. Just try to take a deep breath and give up.
9. You self-medicate
This doesn’t make it healthy, nor does it make it a good idea.
10. You just can't with dating anymore
This is the biggest sign you have love burnout. When you just can’t anymore, you’re done. Finito. Kaput.
"Most people find actively seeking dates (such as online dating) stressful, but what about meeting a potential person organically? What if you meet someone you’d normally be interested in through work or a friend? If even the idea of meeting someone right now sounds dreadful, you're probably burned out in the relationship department," advised relationship coach Kira Asatryan.
11. You are forcing someone to stay with you
Panitanphoto via Shutterstock
This is the point where I’m going to bop you on the nose with a newspaper and yell “NO!” This is not only unhealthy, but this is downright cruel. While you may not think this is such a bad thing, the truth is that this is still a form of rape. Don’t do it.
12. You don’t think there’s anyone out there for you
I can assure you as someone who has all but abandoned the thought of a man ever proposing, you’re not alone. And it’s also a sign that you’re just as burned out as I am. I’m sorry you have to feel this way. It sucks, but at least we can be good to ourselves.
Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer whose work has been featured in Yahoo, BRIDES, Your Daily Dish, New Theory Magazine, and others.
