One Trait The Very Best Relationships Have In Common
If you want your relationship to last, be sure to foster this important quality.
G-Stock Studio / Shutterstock We all want a relationship where both sides trust and respect each other. But with so much advice out there, it can be hard to figure out what really works.
So, what's one thing you can do right now to improve your relationship? Speaker and performance coach Sabastian Enges talks about how reciprocity can help make your relationship stronger.
The One Trait That The Best Relationships Have
"The most frustrating relationships to be in long-term are the unequal ones," says Enges. And many of us enter these relationships without realizing how unfair our relationships are.
But if you want a powerful relationship there needs to be a foundation of reciprocity and equality. Both people need to bring something to the table.
Deep down inside we know this is true. If we look at the most reliable people in our lives, we'll likely see some form of reciprocity in those relationships.
Enges states, "There's an equality to how you guys come together."
But if there's no reciprocity, who do you think builds the quickest resentment? The person giving everything or the person taking everything? Nine times out of ten it's the giver.
The giver feels betrayed, hurt, and confused by the taker's actions. They're likely thinking, "I'e given you everything. Yeah. And now I feel like you are unequal," says Enges.
So, if you're in an unequal relationship, how can you build a more balanced connection with your partner? Here are some tips from Forever Families.
To Create An Equal Relationship
1. Share Household Duties.
This should go without saying, but sharing household responsibilities is crucial for an equal relationship.
According to Forever Families, "There are two different kinds of housework, 'occasional' and 'routine.'"
Occasional jobs like mowing the grass or fixing the kitchen sink don't have to be done every day. During these occasional chores, there's not always a need to keep track of who does what every time.
But for routine chores like doing the dishes or cooking, it's best to split them up and keep track of them daily
2. Work as a team.
Speaking of chores, they can be a pain to get through, right? They're dull, and most of us don't find scrubbing the toilet bowl too thrilling.
That's why it's important to work as a team to get stuff done. Figure out a time when you both can clean the house together.
While cleaning be sure to complete chores together. For example, fold the clothes together or cook together.
This not only makes the chores more enjoyable but also allows you and your partner to spend quality time together.
Plus, working as a team helps you get better at thinking and acting as a team.
3. Don't make decisions independently.
If you're in a relationship you need to get into the habit of making decisions together. One partner shouldn't be deciding everything that happens, especially when it comes to drastic decisions.
Even if you're not married, this is a great habit to develop. It can help you naturally turn to your partner more to discuss and decide things together.
Being in an unequal relationship can be tough and confusing for both people. But if you work on your reciprocity, you can turn things around and make your relationship flourish.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, and family topics.