Men Often Commit To Women Who Have 5 'Green-Flag' Qualities
The best signs to look for.
Helgy | Canva You've been dating a guy for a few weeks, and things are going great. You want to know where you stand. You want to make sure he isn't seeing anyone else, and if you're being honest, a small part of you wants to know when you can change your Facebook relationship status from "single" to "in a relationship."
Having the "Define The Relationship" (DTR) talk generally only makes him feel backed into a corner because he feels like you want something from him — in this case, a commitment — that he hasn't offered up on his own.
The best way to get a man to commit isn't by pleading your case and making ultimatums; it's by being the kind of woman who doesn't need him. Suddenly, he'll want to be with you. Sound easier said than done? Not really! Check it out.
Men commit to women who have these 5 'green-flag' qualities:
1. She's fun to hang around with.
Be the kind of girl he wants to hang out with, not someone who is only out to get something from him. Bring more to the table than you want to take away, and make it your mission to make him laugh. He'll begin to associate you with his increased happiness. Men love funny women, research explains to us.
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When you chill out, stop worrying about where you stand, and instead focus on enjoying the time you have together, he'll start having so much fun that he wants to do it again, and again, and again—as long as you both live.
2. She sticks to her standards.
If the guy you've been dating repeatedly flakes on plans, flirts with other women in your presence, or displays any other shady behavior, walk away.
Some men like to push their boundaries, and if they see that you'll accept their subpar treatment, there stops being any reason for them to treat you better.
When you stand up and say, "No more," all of a sudden, he realizes he's about to lose you, and he probably won't like it. It just might be the wake-up call that he needs.
3. She doesn't sleep with him right away.
This might sound like your grandma's advice, and we feel a bit archaic writing this down ... but just hear us out. When you take the prospect of intimacy off the table, a guy is left with the choice to walk away or stick it out.
Where he would usually be all caught up in trying to get into your pants, now he can use that extra time and energy to get to know you as a person. What a novel idea!
4. She hangs out with guy friends.
When you tell the guy you're seeing that you can't watch his hockey game because you're having lunch with your amazing, successful, single friend Tom, he's bound not to be too pleased about it.
Most men don't believe that males and females can be friends simply because they know how men use friendships as a means to get women. If he cares about you, he'll be threatened and might be motivated to lock it down before Tom has a chance.
5. She has her own life.
Make it clear that you aren't holding your life up to wait for him, but do it with actions, not threats. Order your new passport if you've always wanted to move to London and have finally gotten a great job offer.
On a smaller scale, maintain your other relationships and interests, and continue to do the things that matter to you. Keep your life full, exciting, and fulfilling.
It will become evident that he can either join in for the ride or risk missing out on the adventure of a lifetime.
Lottie Williams is the Head of Content at We Love Dates. She has been featured in Patti Knows, the Independent, askmen, and more.