Life Coach Reveals What She And Her Partner Send Each Other Daily To Avoid Bad Days From Destroying Their Relationship
It's all about choosing to focus on the positives.
fizkes | Shutterstock It's easy to let the stressors of life bleed into your relationships and inadvertently hurt the ones you care about most. Sometimes, it only takes one person in a couple to impact the mood and overall health of the relationship. A life coach who specializes in neuroscience is urging people who are in an emotional rut with their partners to make this one small change to their daily routine to avoid letting negative emotions impact their love.
The coach asserted that this daily habit will not only invigorate your relationship but uplift your mood as well.
The life coach shared that she and her partner take a photo of the best part of their day every day and send it to one another.
Rachelle Indra, a life coach with a specialization in neuroscience, recommends making this one change in your daily routine with your partner to enrich both of your lives.
Previously, Indra shared some insights on the phenomenon of “lucky girl syndrome,” or a mindset that involves relying on luck, wishes, and visualization to achieve goals. She recently shared a follow-up TikTok video piggybacking onto the idea of lucky girl syndrome by revealing how she achieved some of her relationship goals with her partner with the implementation of one sweet habit.
“I wanted to bring this up because this might be something that will help you,” Indra said. Years ago, she said that she and her partner would return home from work and vent all of their feelings of frustration to each other. They soon discovered that what they were doing was not productive for their relationship.
“And then we realized this sucks because we're missing each other all day at work, but then we come home from work, and we're just, like, [emotionally] vomiting and dumping on each other, and then we're making ourselves depressed when we're together,” Indra said.
Rather than focusing on all the bad things that happened throughout the day, Indra introduced the idea of focusing on the good by suggesting that she and her partner take a picture of the best part of their day and share it with one another. She said it could be anything, from picking up a favorite coffee before work to noticing sunshine glistening through an office window.
The coach didn’t realize it at the time, but sharing the most positive things about the day with her partner improved her emotional well-being.
“I didn't realize the neuroscience behind that. The reticular activating center that I was activating, and he was activating when we started to do that,” she said. “It doesn’t mean that we didn’t have bad days, and it doesn’t mean we didn’t have bad moments in the day; it just means that our reticular activating system was choosing to focus on trying to find the positive.”
Research has shown that positivity supports brain health by improving your mental health, enhancing your relationships, and increasing resilience during difficult moments.
According to Indra, she and her partner didn’t just stop at one picture. Some days, they took up to five photos of some of their favorite moments to share with one another.
Maria Markevich | Shutterstock
When your brain sees someone you love feeling joy, it can spark personal joy.
“I didn't understand mirror neurons at the time, and that just seeing the man I loved have his best parts of his day actually gave me all these endorphins and great feelings about sharing in his joy,” she explained.
Mirror neurons are a type of neuron that activates both when an individual performs an action and when they observe someone else performing the same action. For example, when you watch someone smile, the mirror neurons in your brain activate in a similar way as if you were smiling yourself. A similar phenomenon happens when you see the people you love engaging in something that makes them happy. You cannot help but feel happy yourself!
Indra said she recommends her picture-sending relationship hack to all of her clients to strengthen their relationships. It doesn’t even have to be done with your romantic partner. You can send and receive the best parts of your day with your best friend, your siblings, your parents, or anyone else who holds a special place in your life!
While we will all experience bad days, actively choosing to recognize and appreciate the good trains our brains to notice opportunities rather than obstacles. This shift in perspective enables us to handle our most difficult days with a more proactive attitude, and having a loving partner to do it all with makes it all the more worth it!
Megan Quinn is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in English and a minor in Creative Writing. She covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on justice in the workplace, personal relationships, parenting debates, and the human experience.