You Need To Let Go Of Him If He Doesn't Do This One Thing
It's an important trait for a healthy relationship.
Getty Images via Canva By Allison Buschur
When you think of a healthy relationship, which qualities first come to mind? Trust, love, respect, patience, and loyalty are words that probably cross your mind first.
But have you ever thought of laughter as being a quality for a healthy, loving relationship? Maybe not, but it is pretty important.
Have you ever been in a relationship where you couldn’t laugh and enjoy yourself around the person you’re with? Or worse, have you ever been with someone who won’t even acknowledge your silly, maybe somewhat corny, jokes now and then?
I once had a boyfriend who did not think I was funny, like, at all. Now, mind you, I’m no comedian, but I do have a sense of humor, and I know a good joke or two.
Whenever I even tried to tell a joke or be funny, no matter how corny it was, he would look at me like I was an idiot. Unfortunately, I let this go on way too long.
I lost myself trying to please someone else. I constantly felt depreciated.
Yes, I settled. He didn’t appreciate me in any manner and always took me for granted, and I knew this because as soon as we broke up, he thought I was the funniest girl in the world.
Funny how that works, huh?
If you’re anything like me, you laugh about next to everything, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. Laughter characterizes happiness, and happiness is the best free thing you can get in life.
The key is to make yourself happy before anyone else can try, but when it comes time to find happiness with someone else by your side, why wouldn’t you choose someone who makes you laugh?
Not just a silly little giggle now and then. No, I’m talking full, hearty laughs that make your stomach hurt, the kind that makes tears come out of your eyes, and that makes you genuinely realize you wouldn’t want to be doing anything else with anyone else.
That’s how it should be.
If you can’t laugh about things and be silly in your relationships, is it really a relationship at all? No.
It shouldn’t matter if you’ve been with someone for two weeks, two years or twenty years. Married or not, you should still be able to laugh with your partner and, if you can’t, then it’s not right.
You may laugh a lot during the honeymoon stage of the relationship, but if you can’t find laughter after that, after the butterflies stop, after you know the other person like the back of your own hand, it’s not right.
In Proverbs 17:22, it states, “A cheerful heart is good medicine.” Laughter helps us cope, it helps us relieve stress, and most importantly, laughter helps us love our lives.
I don’t think it’s possible to love someone if you can’t laugh around them or make them laugh at least once, if not more, every day.
Be with someone who brings out that sparkle in your eye, who makes you smile so hard your dimples come out, who you can laugh with every day, and one who can’t get enough of your silliness.
For someone who likes to laugh as much as I do, it still baffles me that I settled for someone who took that for granted. Let’s just say I won’t be making that mistake twice.
Allison Buschur is a writer and former contributor to Unwritten, where she wrote on topics of self-esteem and relationships. Visit her author profile for more.