3 Simple Ways To Stay Grounded During The Rush Of Infatuation
Your body is a chemistry lab of love, don't get swept away by the rave.
People often adore the honeymoon phase in a relationship when everything is new and shiny, and you have met a person who checks all your boxes. The unknown is filled with your ideal traits.
For a moment in time, you’ve acquired the perfect person. Of course, this is an illusion. As you get to know each other, your quirks, annoying habits, and traumas will slowly come to the surface.
There are so many variables contributing to this. For example, we are often victims of our autopilot. The brain does not care about our happiness. It simply wants us to survive. It does this by repeating whatever we’ve done in the past, regardless of whether the outcome was good or bad. If you’re still alive, your brain sees it as a success.
Dopamine, adrenaline, and the first stage of relationships
By now, most people are aware that the honeymoon phase can't last forever. But there is something that is not frequently discussed. When you first meet someone you are excited about, you are flooded with dopamine and adrenaline, and this can wreak havoc on your personal life.
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How this stage can become destructive
This surge often causes us to cycle more frequently through our destructive patterns. For instance, someone tends to give up quickly on relationships and start over. They meet someone they're excited about, and the adrenaline and dopamine keep them from sleeping. They start to feel sick and arrive late for a meeting. At some point, their brain will ask, "Why are we feeling this way? This is not good. What is the new thing in our life that could be contributing to this? Oh, it’s that person. Let’s get rid of them and start over."
Meanwhile, as adrenaline and dopamine surge through your veins, fueled by the excitement this person brings, you can't help but wonder if they could be the one you have been searching for. This mix of exhilaration and trepidation is a positive bodily response, yet it can also lead to exhaustion and stress.
How to avoid self-destructive patterns in the first stage of a new relationship
But fear not, you are not doomed. The key is to stay aware.
1. Remind yourself what's really happening in your body
Check-in with your body and remind yourself that this excitement is what you seek. It may feel overwhelming initially, but it will subside.
As we navigate this surge of emotions, another challenge emerges the risk of growing stagnant and bored. But stay focused. When you encounter someone new and exciting, your body throws an impromptu rave. Adrenaline acts as the overenthusiastic bouncer, pumping up your heart rate and making your hands shake while dopamine takes on the role of the DJ who spins tracks to leave you euphoric and invincible. Your brain becomes the hottest club in town, flooded with a cocktail of neurochemicals that transform every glance, touch, and word into an electrifying experience. It's a biochemical party, and everyone's invited!
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2. Embrace the excitement
Before a relationship solidifies, there's a phase filled with nervous excitement, tinged with the hope that this person might indeed be 'the one.' It's an exhilarating yet intimidating time where every interaction is pregnant with potential. Your heart races with the prospect of a shared future, but there's a flicker of doubt, questioning whether your feelings will be reciprocated.
In this transitional phase, serotonin, the mood stabilizer, and oxytocin, the bonding hormone, create feelings of well-being and closeness. However, the addition of adrenaline and dopamine adds complexity, resulting in an overwhelming roller coaster of emotions. It's a blend of 'This could be amazing!' and 'Oh my God, what if I get hurt?' Despite the uncertainty, it's a moment to embrace the excitement of what could be.
It's a good thing when this happens because of the surge of adrenaline and dopamine signals you're truly engaged and excited. These chemicals heighten your senses, boost your energy, and create feelings of pleasure and motivation. This natural high can enhance your interactions, making you more confident, alert, and open to new experiences. It's your body's way of telling you that something—or someone—special has captured your interest, potentially leading to meaningful connections and memorable moments.
3. Keep yourself grounded
To calm the biochemical party raging in your veins, try grounding techniques like deep breathing and mindfulness. Take slow deep breaths to activate your parasympathetic nervous system, which helps counteract the adrenaline rush. Engage in activities to relax like walking, listening to soothing music, or practicing yoga. Remind yourself to stay present and focus on the moment rather than getting swept away by excitement.
These strategies can help dial down the intensity and bring you back to a more balanced state, especially when navigating the excitement and worry of a new relationship. Remember, it's natural to feel hopeful but don't let it overshadow the joy of discovering someone new.
So, as you enjoy the thrill of the ride, remember that your body is a chemistry lab of love, working tirelessly to make this journey one for the books. Embrace the butterflies, savor the moments, and let the chemistry of connection lead the way!
Erika Jordan is an internationally acclaimed love and relationship expert, NLP practitioner, author, media personality, and a leader in the field of digital romance and online dating.