10 Honest Tips For A Better Dating Profile, According To International Dating Coach
What men really want to see on your dating profile.
Weekend Images Inc. | Canva When I read women’s profiles on dating sites, I think to myself, Holy crap, do these women not have any male friends who can help them write this? It’s amazing — most women write dating profiles in a way that'll instantly turn men off and send them running in the other direction! Ladies, here are 10 things you need to know about writing your online dating profile (from a guy's perspective.)
Here are 10 honest tips for a better dating profile, according to an international dating coach:
1. Your online dating profile is an ad for you
That’s all it is. Your profile is an advertisement for you. All you need to do is to grab a guy’s attention and make him want to find out more about you. You’re not trying to make him fall in love with you on your profile. Just concentrate on getting our attention and giving us some of your “benefits.”
2. Lower your expectations
I read an online dating profile a week ago where the woman said her ideal first date would be on a yacht. Reading that as a potential date, I think this woman is super high-maintenance. How many guys are going to rent a yacht for a woman they're meeting for the first time? What if there’s no chemistry? Now I have to sit on a yacht with you for two hours feeling bored and miserable. No, thanks!
3. Stop saying “good sense of humor”
Everyone wants to meet the funny guy. The problem is there aren’t enough Jim Carrey’s running around for you all. Most guys aren’t that funny even when they try, and they know it. They’ve heard it all their lives from their friends. When they see you want to meet the funny guy, they instantly rule themselves out and don’t contact you. Maybe he was an amazing guy who could have made you laugh, but now he won’t contact you because of the pressure you've already put on him.
4. Stop "looking for friendship first"
Great! Every guy who has a dating profile is there because he ends up in the friend zone with every woman he meets. He's on a dating site because he wants to meet women looking for love. Yet, here’s another woman looking for “friendship.”
5. Cut the artistic photos
Some women have photos where they’re upside down on a bed or at a weird angle with their faces downward. Do you know what that makes guys think? It makes us think you’re trying to fool us with trick photography.
6. Include a full-body picture
If you’re not willing to put a full body picture up, but claim you’re curvy, athletic, or fit, guys aren't going to believe you. Put a full photo of yourself and make sure the date is on there, so we know it’s what you look like now and not five years ago.
Pexels / Rerisson Hofniel
7. Keep it simple
Men don’t to know your whole life story right off the bat. We want to know you’re a cool woman to contact and that we have a chance of receiving a response from you.
8. If you look at us more than once, say hello
We can see who viewed our profile and when. If you’ve looked at our profile more than a couple of times, why aren’t you sending us a message? Something intrigues you about us. What do you have to lose? If you’re attracted to us, or at least want to know more, send us an introduction.
9. Ask for a date
Most guys are shy online. Don’t wait for him to ask for a date. If you’ve messaged each other a few times and there’s some chemistry, ask him out. Men look for signs you’re interested in, but most of the time they have no idea what to look for. You could be giving him all the signs under the sun, and he still won’t get it. Be direct. If you want to meet up, tell him. Don’t wait for weeks because that’s when you lose momentum.
10. Don’t tell us off
Reading a profile that says, “If all you want is my body, if you’re going to put work and friends before me, and if you’re not going to give me the respect I deserve, then don’t even bother sending me a message,” honestly does nothing to attract me. It makes you sound like an angry and hurt woman, and it shows you haven’t worked through your relationship issues. We’re not all cheating cavemen. We want to love you, so be nice, get to know us, and give us a chance to prove it.
David Wygant was a dating coach who spent the past 20 years helping men and women transform their love lives. As a lead writer for Ask Men and Huffington Post, his advice has been offered across television, newspapers, and magazines, including MTV, The New York Times, MSNBC, Fox News, Cosmopolitan, Men's Health, E! Entertainment Television, and more.