27 Gestures That Make You A Wonderful Spouse To Be Around
The easiest ways to be a stellar spouse.
It might not be objective to believe that you have the best spouse among all the other spouses. Sometimes, what your head and heart want in the perfect partner are entirely different.
Relationships are a two-way street, so it’s crucial that you offer similar valuable gestures and not expect your partner to do all the hard work. If your partner doesn’t have all the attributes or make all the moves you’d like, it doesn’t mean there's no future — but these sweet gestures can be key to success.
Here are 27 gestures that make you a wonderful spouse to be around:
1. Give your lover a dozen roses — with a creative twist
Give eleven red roses and one white rose. Attach a note that reads: "In every bunch, there's one who stands out — and you are that one."
2. Get your partner a wristwatch
Inscribe it with: "I always have time for you." This symbolizes a deep commitment to spending quality time together, cherishing shared moments, and valuing the future you're building as a couple.
A watch represents the passage of time and the importance of making the most of it with your loved one. Research published in Current Opinion in Psychology found that it's a thoughtful gesture that shows you're paying attention to their tastes and want to be a part of their everyday life.
3. Identify that one pivotal event that brought the two of you together
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Celebrate that event every year. Identifying a pivotal event that brought two people together is crucial because it can help you understand the foundation of your relationship, recognize the shared experiences that bonded you, and appreciate the significance of that moment in your connection.
A Frontiers in Psychology study found this event can be a reference point for understanding your relationship dynamics, how you've grown together since then, and the emotional significance it holds for both partners.
4. Practice even-day/odd-day romance
On even days, it's your turn to be romantic, and on odd days it's your partner's turn.
5. Following a bubble bath you've prepared for her, wrap her in a towel you've warmed up in the dryer
Caring behaviors from a spouse are crucial for a healthy relationship. A 2018 study found that they foster a sense of security, intimacy, and well-being, contributing to a positive self-image and overall relationship satisfaction. They demonstrate love, support, and responsiveness to your partner's needs, especially during stressful situations.
6. Write your partner a love letter or poem on one sheet of paper
Glue it to thin cardboard, cut it into puzzle-shaped pieces, then mail all the pieces. Or mail one puzzle piece per day!
7. Visit a karaoke bar and surprise your lover by getting up and singing "your song" to him/her
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A karaoke bar can be a fun place to surprise your partner with a song. According to a study from Dalarna University, you want something fun, memorable, and maybe a little adventurous — but also something that gives you both a chance to relax and be yourselves.
8. Make a giant greeting card
Use a big cardboard box (such as the type used to pack a refrigerator) to express your love through artwork. A 2024 study found that thoughtful gestures leverage positive reinforcement in psychology, essentially rewarding them with something they enjoy and creating a positive association with you and the gesture. The large quantity conveys a sense of generosity and thoughtfulness, showing that you put extra effort into the gift.
9. Call your partner just to say "I love you"
It manifests intense attachment needs, a desire for constant reassurance, potential insecurity within the relationship, and a need to feel close and connected even when physically apart. However, a study by the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships recommended that the frequency and impact can vary depending on the individual and relationship dynamics.
10. Slow dance at a restaurant
Even when there's no music playing.
11. Take a trip to Paris
A 2024 study by Annals of Tourism Research Empirical Insights found that a trip to a romantic city can be seen as a powerful way to strengthen your relationship by creating shared, positive experiences in a romantic setting, fostering a sense of connection, and potentially boosting intimacy through novelty and shared challenges in a beautiful and culturally rich environment.
Paris is widely recognized as the "City of Love," which can subconsciously set the stage for a more romantic experience and heighten feelings of affection.
12. Spend the entire day watching romantic movies
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According to a University of Rochester study, watching and discussing relationship movies with a partner can be as effective as counseling in reducing divorce rates. A 2019 study also found that people who watch romantic movies and television dramas are more likely to believe in "love conquers all" and report higher relationship satisfaction.
13. Buy a lottery ticket
Give it to your partner with a little note attached: "I hit the jackpot when I married you!"
14. Pick flowers for your partner
This act signifies care, affection, and a desire to express love and appreciation through a tangible symbol. A study published by Evolutionary Psychology found that It often creates a sense of intimacy and connection by conveying thoughtfulness and a positive emotional impact on the recipient, boosting their mood and feeling valued.
15. Write a short note to your partner spread out over several postcards, then mail the cards one at a time
You'll build anticipation for the romantic conclusion on the final postcard. (Maybe deliver that last one in person.)
16. If you're not much of a writer, create an audio love letter
Sit down with a tape recorder and talk to her for 10 minutes. Then gift-wrap it and mail it to her.
17. Call a local radio station and request a special love song to be dedicated to your partner
Make sure he or she is listening.
18. Make a custom certificate
(You can get blank certificate forms at a stationery or paper store.) Here are some suggestions: A certificate "For Putting Up With Me Over the Years," an award for "The World's Best Wife," a ribbon "For Hugs & Kisses Above and Beyond the Call of Duty."
19. Place a little love note or poem under the driver's-side windshield wiper of your partner's car
Taking time to write a note, even a small one, shows that the partner is paying attention and putting effort into the relationship.
20. Have "your song" playing on the stereo when your partner returns home from work
When a song is linked to a specific shared experience or memory, listening to it together can bring back those feelings and strengthen your bond. A study published by the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships also found that the situation in which you share the song - like a memorable moment or simply listening casually - can influence its meaning.
21. On your partner's birthday, send a thank-you card to his/her mother
"Thank you for bringing him/her into this world and raising him/her as you did. I never thought I would find someone as compatible as we are, and I have you to thank for my happiness."
22. Make a toast to one another when holding a wine glass
Make eye contact. Take turns making the toast. Whisper it.
23. Get the whole family of products in the fragrance of your partner's favorite scent
By family of products, we mean bath powder, soap, lotion, candles, etc. When encountered by their partner, the scent becomes associated with the individual and can evoke memories and emotions.
According to a 2018 study, personalized scents can contribute to the overall chemistry and connection between partners, making them an essential aspect of romantic relationships.
24. Spread rose petals all over the bedroom
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Roses, especially red ones, are deeply ingrained in the culture as a symbol of love and passion. Scattering petals on the bed convey this sentiment directly to your partner.
25. Write a classic, romantic, heartfelt love letter
Most adults haven't written a love letter since high school. (Why not? Have we lost our youthful idealism, or have we just gotten lazy?)
26. Surprise your partner by performing one of their chores
And not something easy like carrying the groceries in from the car, but something that requires some time and effort — like cooking all the meals over a weekend or cleaning the entire house.
27. Hold hands
2017 research on love found that small gestures and acts of kindness were considered the best indicators of love. Handholding, hugging, cuddling, and compassion were cited as prime expressions of love.
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