8 Texts From An Emotionally Available Husband That Make His Wife Feel Safe & Protected
Sometimes, it's the little things that count the most, especially in relationships.
Look Studio / Shutterstock.com With so many stressors in life, it's the little things that matter the most, and that's equally true in marriage and relationships. And for one woman on TikTok, what's making a huge difference in her relationship with her husband is something most of us probably don't give much thought to.
A woman shared eight text messages her emotionally available husband sent that left her feeling safe, protected, and heard.
Wife, mom, and doula Avree Chanel Jamison, known as @avreechanel on TikTok, frequently shares glimpses of her life in the mountains of Colorado with her husband James, and their baby girl. Recently, she shared a series of eight text messages from James that made a huge difference to her and, as she put it, "healed me."
They are examples of what a relationship can be when two people aren't afraid to be emotionally vulnerable and communicative.
1. 'I'm never going to abandon you, not ever.'
This text was sent during a moment of conflict between Avree and her husband. How he handled the heated moment is a master class in conflict resolution, especially for anyone who might have abandonment or attachment issues.
Jamison's husband suggested that rather than get back into the argument when he gets home they instead take time to "cool off" and rest, because "I'm not going anywhere." He then assured her, "I was here yesterday, I am here now, I will be here tomorrow morning and ... every morning after that."
People with attachment trauma or abandonment issues can frequently feel like conflict means the relationship is over, and explicitly acknowledging that's not the case can make all the difference.
2. 'I would hurt anybody's feelings in this world to protect yours.'
Certainly a bold statement, but one that illustrates how he prioritizes his wife and their partnership. Many people were deeply moved, with one commenter saying the text made them "tear up."
Others weren't so sure, though, feeling like it was setting a toxic standard that condones abusive behavior toward anyone so long as they aren't his wife. But in a follow-up TikTok, Jamison explained misinterpreted text. It was in response to an incident in which someone insulted her.
Rather than keep the peace, James was unafraid to offend the other person in order to stand up for his wife.
3. 'We got this and we got each other.'
A simple statement with a significant message: No matter how picture-perfect a person or couple's life may seem to be, tough times are always going to come around eventually. That's just part of life.
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Jamison's husband took the time to remind her that she is never alone in the struggles she faces and that he'll always be by her side.
That should go without saying in any healthy relationship or marriage, but we all need to hear it sometimes.
4. He offered proactive, helpful suggestions and support for tough moments.
Jamison said that the fourth text happened during a moment when she was violently ill while pregnant with their daughter. After cautioning her not to panic, he offered suggestions that might help the anxiety she was feeling, like meditation and calming music. He then shared what he'd proactively done to help: he got her some ginger chews, a holistic remedy that can help with nausea.
Gestures like this certainly aren't going to cure morning sickness, but telling your partner you have their back when they are scared and vulnerable certainly helps lighten the load.
5. 'You've never been more beautiful to me than you are now.'
This text came during one of the most vulnerable times a woman can experience, right after childbirth. Jamison's husband wasn't about to let her think his feelings about her looks had changed at all.
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"I know you are down about your postpartum body baby but you've never been more beautiful ... to me than you are now," he texted. It must have done Jamison a world of good to know that as far as her husband was concerned, nothing had changed.
6. 'I will fight to keep from losing you.'
"It is clear to me now that I've never known true love and now that I have found it with you, I will fight ... to keep from losing it," James wrote to his wife.
That may seem sappy or overwrought, but all relationships run aground at one point or another, even mere friendships hit hard times eventually. And for many — again, especially those with abandonment or attachment trauma — being reassured that you're partner is in it for the long haul can make all the difference.
7. 'You are doing amazing on every level ... You got this, I got you.'
This text came during a difficult postpartum moment for Jamison, and it touches on something all parents feel over and over again, the fear that they're just not cut out for parenting and are messing the whole thing up. Jamison's husband made sure to say the one thing that parents frequently say they need to hear: You're doing a good job. "I know you are having a hard time postpartum," he wrote, "but watching you navigate it from the outside you are doing AMAZING on every level."
He went on to call Jamison's ability to "navigate the extreme highs and lows" of the postpartum period "inspiring" and to again reassure her that he's by her side during what many moms say is among the loneliest parts of motherhood.
8. "I see you and hear you."
Therapists often say that the way a couple argues can make all the difference in a relationship, and this is perhaps where James' greatest talents as an emotionally available husband lie.
During a time of conflict between them, he took a moment to stop the conversation and redirect it to simple words of validation: "I see you and hear you." Sometimes that is all any of us need to hear in order to have a productive discussion instead of a fight.
Can a marriage be saved on the basis of text messages alone? Probably not. But it's ultimately not about the text messages but rather about staying open-hearted even during the hardest times so that you can continue to show up for each other for the long haul. It isn't always easy to do, but it certainly makes all the difference.
John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice, and human interest topics.