'Dexting' Is An Awful Dating Term — And It's Probably Happened To You

Can you date someone without ever meeting them?

Last updated on Oct 24, 2024

Woman realizes that the dating term 'dexting' is happening to her. LittleBee80 | Canva
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It says a lot about your life when the guy that you've been "dexting" can predict what you are doing on your night "off" from life. I should take a minute to explain. My night off is when Luc takes Summer for the day or overnight or both.

I could typically use this time to reinvent myself or go out and live the life that a twenty-something girl should be living. Instead, I decide to just uncork a bottle of wine, put on some sweats, and veg out while watching Vampire Diaries. Total waste of time, but hey, we all have our things. Right?

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So that's that. Now, dexting is a term I invented for what I call "dating through text." Yup, in a world where love has been reduced to swiping right or left, it is no surprise that dexting has replaced texting. 

Dexting is when you and a person decide there is some kind of cyber connection and you begin to text.

According to a study from The Independent, it takes millennials an average of 4 days to exchange numbers on dating apps.

Whether or not you have successful text conversations will determine if you would like to meet. If the meet does happen, it either goes well, or somewhere in the middle of the date, you decide you are deleting that stupid dating app the second you walk in the door, or even the second you get in your car. I mean, the world is an ocean and there are plenty of fish at your fingertips.

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Well, what happens when you have that cyber connection, but the meeting never happens? Days become weeks and weeks become months and you are still texting with this special someone but the face-to-face contact never actually happens. This, my friend, is called "dexting." You are dating a person solely through text messaging.

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Dexting Is The Horrifying New Dating Trend August de Richelieu / Pexels

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My cyber boyfriend and I have been dexting for three weeks now. 

We say good morning to one another, we say good night. We give each other compliments and wish each other a wonderful day. It's soon to utter the words "I love you" which in dexting is replaced by the emoji of the heart eyes combined with the kissing Emoji but I hope that one day, this will happen (though, I am in no rush.) As mentioned earlier, it has gotten so serious, that he can even predict what I am doing this very night.

I have never met someone who I am so compatible with. Through countless selfies and superficial questions, I feel like I know this guy. 

Well, as much as I can get to know someone through cyber technology. It is just like a scene from Her  —only with an actual human being.

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Dexting Is The Horrifying New Dating Trend Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels

RELATED: Why He Texts You, But Never Asks You Out

It isn't that I don't want to get to know this guy in person; it's just that he seems so amazing via cyber waves and perfected selfies. 

Why ruin a good thing? There is no way I can ever get hurt by someone who I have never met.  The only thing I lose if this dexting thing doesn't work out is freedom from moving my fingers all the time. 

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Too much texting can give you arthritis, UCLA Health confirms. So, there. Worst case scenario, I get arthritis and I have a forever dexting partner.

It sounds ridiculous I know but in a world where people hardly speak to each other and make connections due to an obsession with social media, candy crush, and online shopping for significant others, dexting is the thing of the future. The way I see it, I am just ahead of the game. 

Plus, who has time for real dates when there are hours of mind-blowing TV shows waiting to be streamed through my one true love? Netflix.

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RELATED: 6 Early, Ultra-Effective Dating Texting Rules To Live By

Marcella Garcia is a freelance writer and journalist who appears as a commentator on WGBH, MSNBC, and other media outlets.