4 Qualities Abbey & David From ‘Love On The Spectrum’ Have That Many Of Us Lack In Our Own Relationships
“This is what secure love looks like.”
@david_loveonthespectrum / Instagram; PublicDomainPictures / CanvaPro Netflix’s "Love On The Spectrum" has wasted no time in capitalizing on the season of love, having just released the second season of the popular show on January 19. The “romantic docuseries” has become a viral sensation, following people on the Autism spectrum in their journeys to find love.
As the show has grown in popularity, so have discussions about the raw, real, and beautiful connections the series has cultivated. Not only does the show demonstrate the vulnerability of navigating the dating world, but it illuminates Autism, not as a barrier, but as an advantage in developing honest, healthy relationships.
Abbey Romeo and David Isaacman’s incredible love story captured the hearts of many across the country and illuminated exactly what a healthy and secure relationship looks like.
Here are 4 enviable qualities of Abbey and David’s relationship from ‘Love On The Spectrum’.
1. Abbey and David exude confidence while leaving space for their partner to truly ‘be themselves.’
Relationship Coach Cybele isn’t the only one who shed a few tears while watching Abbey and David’s love story unfold on their screens. She admitted that the depiction of their story captures exactly what so many people search for in their own relationships.
Throughout their two-year-long relationship, both on and off screen, the pair have built a foundation of trust, honesty, respect, and pure joy — something that many people wait a lifetime to find. Whether it’s watching Abbey talk fondly of David over a glass of Chardonnay or listening to David sing “Can You Feel The Love Tonight” from their favorite movie, you can feel the confidence, passion, and care they each bring to the partnership.
“This is what secure love looks like,” Cybele said in her video. “Being your most authentic self and not being met with resistance or discouragement. Actually being invited in to co-create and participate to get to ‘the good stuff’.”
That’s not to say that David and Abbey’s relationship, or any “secure” relationship, is inherently perfect. However, it’s this honest and confident foundation that allows them to expand their existing emotional intimacy whenever conflict arises, giving them the tools to navigate whatever comes next.
2. Both partners remember and value the small things.
Sometimes, it’s the little things in relationships that truly bring us closer. The side of the bed we like to sleep on, our favorite candy, our most embarrassing childhood memories — it’s things like these that bond us with our partners.
“This is what creates the stage,” Cybele says. “The stage in which you can enter and really fulfill long-term desires, get to be something that you’ve always wanted to be, or feel things that you’ve always wanted to feel.”
When our partners make an effort to remember and take action on those minuscule conversations, it’s a testament to their love. They not only listen, but they remember. And, unfortunately, as many people realize, these partners are few and far between.
David’s planned trip to Africa with Abbey, shown in the second season, was exactly this “testament to love” people crave.
The couple’s Africa trip was so much more than an escape from reality or a chance to relax — it was a milestone. From their very first date, Abbey and David shared their love of Africa and safari animals, especially lions, with each other.
3. Abbey and David are both incredibly honest in expressing what they want, need, and hope for from their partner.
A great deal of Abbey’s journey on the show has been illuminating her incredible communication skills, something that she vulnerably shared was a struggle for her as a young girl. After almost 23 years of “speech therapy,” she clearly learned how to communicate, not only well, but better than most partners in modern-day relationships.
It’s her and David’s communication, alongside trust and honesty, that allows the pair to continuously grow. Rather than be held back by unknown fears or suspicions of their partner, they are radically open in expressing what they need, want, and love.
“They’re so open to giving what the other person wants, in order to keep building on that vision [of the future], to keep fulfilling it," Cybele said.
4. They live joyously and gratefully in the present moment, ‘in awe’ of every experience they share.
Many couples struggle to live in the moment. Even when they’re adamant about scheduling dates or spending quality time together, many admit they find their minds wandering to their responsibilities the next day or stressful parts of their lives.
To live in the present moment, couples have to be clear on their expectations, give their full attention to their partner, stay off social media, and experience the sensations of life that you only notice when you’re fully engaged.
Abbey and David’s recent theme park trip is a simple example of their ability to always live in the present moment, soaking up the enjoyment of each other’s presence, amidst a variety of different worries and fears.
When David expressed his fear about riding the “Jurassic Park” attraction, Abbey had no problem respecting his boundaries and choosing to go alone, letting them both enjoy the day with no forced or unenjoyable interactions.
So, whether you’re searching for a relationship or trying to navigate your own, Abbey and David’s love story is a testament to the simplicity of connection. Be honest, confident, and present and you’ll find it much easier to find security in the insecure landscape of modern dating.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a news and entertainment writer at YourTango focusing on pop culture analysis and human interest stories.