Husband Admits That He Is Not Attracted To Wife Anymore After Her Plastic Surgery
"She looks like the blue alien from 'The Fifth Element.'”
Veles Studio / Shutterstock Following his wife's plastic surgery, a man is grappling with conflicting emotions about her altered appearance. Although he affirmed his love for her, he confessed to finding her new look challenging to accept.
Wrestling with this internal conflict, he questioned the ethical implications of sharing his honest sentiments with his wife, fearing the potential hurt it may cause her.
The man is finding it difficult to be around his wife following her plastic surgery.
Sharing his predicament to Reddit, the man revealed that after his wife told him of her intentions to get plastic surgery, he opposed the idea.
“She had the fat sucked out of her face, lip fillers, a neck lift, other stuff I don't really get,” the man wrote. “She looks weird now.” He went so far as to say her new face "freaks him out."
Photo: puhhha / Shutterstock
He has found it especially difficult to be intimate with her, claiming that he has not been able to do so without turning out the lights first.
“It's been a few months, and I kind of dread having to look at her,” the man wrote. “Obviously, she has noticed. She has been bugging me to tell her what's up. I've tried telling her I'm just tired from work. Or that I'm run down. Really anything except for the truth.”
However, after weeks of pressing her husband, assuming that he was having an affair, the woman learned the true reason behind his strange and distant behavior when he finally came clean.
She did not take the news well. “She started crying and said that she needed time alone,” the man wrote, adding that she went to her sister’s house for a few days to collect herself.
“I have been called every name in the book since this happened,” the man shared. “Her sister said I'm a piece of [expletive] for insulting my wife's looks. Her friends all think I'm the [expletive].”
Now, the man is wondering if he should have just kept his mouth shut.
“I still love her, but her face is just weird now,” he wrote. “She looks like the blue alien from 'The Fifth Element.'”
Most people believed that the man’s feelings were valid and that there was nothing wrong with being honest with his wife.
“It’s not your fault that you don’t find her new face attractive. That isn’t a conscious choice,” one Reddit user commented. “I’m all for people doing what they want with their body, but if they are in a relationship and their partner states their dislike of the body modification, then that person should keep in mind the risk of doing it will be their partner's lack of attraction.”
“Freedom of choice is never freedom from consequence. This is the obvious outcome when not considering your partner when making aesthetic changes. Especially ones as dramatic as those described,” another user wrote.
“I think you handled the situation as well as you could, but there's a difficult conversation you and her need to have soon,” another user noted.
While some individuals may feel more confident after undergoing plastic surgery, many of them fail to consider how it can potentially affect their relationships.
According to MentalHelp, some people may struggle to adjust to their partner’s new appearance and may not be as attracted to them as they were before.
Some may feel resentment toward their partner if the surgery was performed without their knowledge beforehand. Others may feel threatened and insecure about their own bodies if their partner is suddenly completely different.
Unrealistic expectations or dissatisfaction with the results of the surgery can also strain the relationship.
While people have the right to do as they please with their own bodies, any major cosmetic procedure should be discussed with a partner first.
Photo: Romariolen / Shutterstock
Thankfully, the man revealed in a follow-up post that he and his wife were able to have a meaningful conversation about why she chose to have plastic surgery and how they would deal with it moving forward.
“She told me that the reason she had the surgery was because her mom and sister talked her into it. They convinced her that she was starting to look old and that I would find someone else to be with if she did not do something,” the man wrote.
When his wife suggested undergoing another surgery to revert her face back to the way it was before, the man begged her not to and assured her that he would get used to her new look.
“I am going to make an effort to show her every day how I still find her desirable, and she is going to make an effort to believe me when I tell her I love her the way she is,” the man wrote.
“I will spend the rest of my life showing her she is the woman I want.”
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.