How To Lose A Guy In 10 Minutes — Relationship Coach Reveals The 5 Reasons Women Lose Good Men
You scare men away.
fizkes | Canva There are things about women that turn us guys on. Lots and lots of things. The biggest one? Feeling desired, according to one study's findings.
And, no, they don't all have to do with revealing outfits and selfies. There are just many things about women that men like, and some things we aren't quite sold on.
Here are the 5 reasons women lose good men:
1. Her interests are limited
Men like to know that women are into them. It gives us an ego boost to know that we are your priority. But we don't want to be your only priority.
We like women who have other things going on. This can be a hobby, a job, or meeting a group of friends for happy hour. It just needs to be something.
When we are the only thing going on in your life, it can generate too much pressure and leave far too little space for us to breathe.
2. She hides her feminine side too often
Women who are "just one of the guys" are great. We love that you are into football, dirty jokes, and watching all the Godfather movies in a row.
But we're not necessarily looking for another buddy. We love the side of you that spends a lot of time in the bathroom taking great care to get your hair just right; the part that asks us to go investigate that loud noise in the basement; and when you dress up in makeup and a black dress for a night out on the town.
Nataliia Solodun / Pexels
It's pretty simple, really: We like it when you show off your feminine side. It's a real turn-on.
3. The dirty talk crosses a line
Talking dirty in bed is generally a good thing. You typically turn us on with anything. Yet, when talking dirty becomes too self-deprecating (or just plain weird), it can be a huge turn-off.
According to research, couples engage in dirty talk to heighten their intimate experiences and share fantasies that they want to turn into reality. But there are lines that some people don't want to cross.
Referring to yourself as "daddy's little girl" "a dirty girl" or "a little baby who has lost her way" can make us feel a little bit gross. So, while talking dirty is a good thing, crossing the line from dirty to creepy isn't.
4. She's too focused on the future
There's a big secret out there that not many women know about. A lot of men also want to get married and have children. The thing is, though, we don't want to do it before we get to know you and fall in love.
We might not even want to think about weddings and baby wipes. Not just yet.
It's because of this that fast-forwarding into the future can be a turn-off. It's not like we never want to talk about the white picket fence and the 2.5 kids.
We just don't want to do it on a first, second, or third date.
5. She assumes all men are the same
You don't want us to assume that you are just like our ex-girlfriends — the ones who shredded our favorite workout clothes, spread outlandish rumors about us, or posted rude social media statuses.
Since you wouldn't want us to assume you are like other girls, don't assume we are like other guys.
Letting one bad experience influence your feelings toward all men will chase us away. Give us a clean slate — chances are, we also think your ex-boyfriend sounds like a total jerk.
Michael Griswold is a dating coach and writer focusing on love and relationships. He has a Ph.D. in relationship and breakup psychology.