My Ex-Husband Stole My Identity And Almost Got Me Arrested

My ex-husband created a fake Facebook account and harassed his (other) ex-wife by pretending to be me. She immediately believed it was me and reported "me" to the police.

The story begins with my mother contacting me out of the blue to tell me that my kids' father's ex-wife (a mouthful) had reached out to her to trash me. My mom wouldn't tell me what was said, only that this woman had said she planned to "ruin my life."

I contacted my ex to tell him to tell his ex-wife to stop harassing my mother. My mom is older, and she's weak and sick. She does not need the stress. He agreed to tell this woman to back off. I thought that would be the end of it but how wrong I was.

Several days later, my ex contacted me on Facebook Messenger (his only mode of communication since he's unhoused and unemployed) to tell me that he contacted his ex-wife's new husband about the harassment.

He told his ex-wife's husband that she was hooking up with him in a hotel room and giving him money. He also told him that she was still stalking me online and harassing my mother.

I ended our chat and told him I did not want him to discuss me with his ex-wife anymore. She has bullied and harassed me for five years.

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The Police Question Me About The Messages

I forgot about the drama until three days later; someone knocked on my door at 8 A.M. I looked through the peek hole and saw it was the police. I opened the door and asked what they needed.

They told me they had a report of harassment and they needed to discuss it with me. They said that my ex's ex-wife contacted them and filled out a police report accusing me of harassing her on Facebook.

I denied it. I told them I had proof of who was behind the harassment: our mutual ex. I showed them my phone of my ex-husband's Facebook messages. 

One of the officers stepped outside to call the ex-wife. I heard him telling her that I was not behind her harassment — it looked like it was her ex-husband. They told me she was surprised as the screen name that contacted her was in my name.

That's when it hit me: My ex-husband created a fake profile in my name with my picture to harass his ex-wife and put the blame on me. It was vindictive, but it didn't work.

The police left and said that if I had further contact with my ex, I should call them.

Flotsam / Shutterstock

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My Ex Unravels, Again

I didn't have contact with my ex for several days after that — until he needed money. I blocked him for several weeks, but he emailed me asking to be unblocked. He promised to be respectful, so I unblocked him.

That's when he regularly started asking me for money. I refused, and he completely unraveled. This time, the insults started, accusing me of creating fake profiles (something I have never done) and claiming I was a "show-off."

He revealed the hospital was admitting him to the psych unit for malnutrition, depression, and anxiety. He demanded I bring the kids to see him at the hospital, or he would never speak to me again.

I was happy to hear he would finally be getting the mental health treatment he needs. But I had no plans to bring the kids to see him until he was in a better mental place; they had endured enough childhood trauma due to his poor choices.

After a few fruitless exchanges, I blocked him for good. If he wants to see the children, he can go to court and petition for supervised visitation.

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After this last experience with my ex, I'm fairly confident my conflicts with his ex-wife are all his doing. He didn't want me to have a chance to tell her my story or the truth about him. He poisoned me against her so she would deem me "crazy" and "unstable." It allowed him to hand-feed her the information he wanted her to know and twisted the truth.

After soul-searching, I don't hate his ex-wife. I pity her. I feel bad she was so easily manipulated by a man who exhibits narcissistic qualities. I'm glad she divorced him. Hopefully, her freedom from his toxicity will improve her life.

I would also like for her to stop cyberstalking me. I would like her to see I'm not the problem. I am his victim, and our children will, for better or worse, forever bond us. She's fortunate she didn't have a child with him.

I'm sure he won't leave me alone. For that matter, even though I am not a threat to her, his ex-wife will probably continue to seek revenge on me, too. But I refuse to engage. I cannot let their misery disrupt my life anymore.

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Chrissie Massey is a writer who loves to share her life experiences with her readers. She has contributed to Yahoo News, Examiner, Inquisitr, Newsbreak, and Medium.