Divorce Lawyer Reveals The Most ‘Petty’ Reason Couples Get Divorced — And It’s Especially Common With Millennials
To some people it is not petty at all, and can be a dealbreaker in their relationship.
Gatot Agri / Shutterstock In a marriage, it is normal to disagree with your spouse on certain issues from time to time. You may have differing views regarding parenting, finances, and where to travel for your next vacation.
Usually, you and your spouse are able to reach a fair compromise, and if you cannot, you agree to disagree.
However, one topic has been driving married couples to the point of divorce — and it's the reason that one divorce lawyer believes is completely “petty.”
A divorce lawyer revealed the most 'petty' reason a couple gets divorced and it's a significant problem among millennial relationships.
When asked what the most ‘petty’ reason a couple has split up is, divorce lawyer Dennis R. Vetrano Jr. claimed that differing political views are the top reason.
“We had a case many years ago where the husband decided because the wife voted for a particular president, that he needed to get divorced from her,” he said in a TikTok video.
However, many people argued that differing political views were anything but petty when it comes to the dissolution of a marriage.
“That’s not a petty reason. Politics are rooted in your values and if you don’t share core values with your partner it can make it impossible to get on the same page about anything,” one TikTok user pointed out.
Another user wrote, “That’s not petty at all. It’s a complete lack of similar values and, ultimately, different ideologies. That’s not how marriages work successfully.”
In today’s divisive political climate, opposing views can be a dealbreaker for some people when getting into a relationship. There is a reason why users can share their political parties on most dating apps.
The upcoming election will once again pit Donald Trump against Joe Biden, and you may find yourself losing your millennial friends or partners if you plan on voting for someone they are not.
According to Wakefield Research marketing firm, 22% of American millennials claimed to have ended their relationships after learning that their partner was affiliated with a different political party.
Additionally, another 22% know someone whose marriage has been strained due to political differences; however, the strain is specifically blamed on differing opinions regarding the 2016 election of Donald Trump.
Many Americans found themselves at odds when Trump took over the White House due to his controversial promises that discriminated against marginalized groups, including accusing Mexican immigrants of bringing “crimes, drugs and rapists” into the country and calling for a ban on Muslims entering the U.S.
Some people, especially those in minority groups, felt personally attacked by Trump’s claims and therefore believed anyone who voted for him was a vote against them.
When it comes to voting for a political candidate, you don’t always have to agree with everything they stand for, and voting for them does not mean that your values align.
We are presented with a limited number of candidates, and it is nearly impossible to find one who agrees with every single one of your core values. We may share the same views when it comes to the economy and completely disagree with their stance on immigration.
In a perfect world, we would be able to vote for whoever we wanted to, and they would be everything we ever imagined in a politician. Unfortunately, that's not how politics works.
When all is said and done, some of our family members, friends, and romantic partners will be voting for the opposite candidate we plan on voting for.
LPETTET / Canva Pro
This could mean the end of some relationships. However, if you believe that your partner is worth fighting for, having a conversation with them about politics can be a real game-changer and potentially even bring you both closer together.
Psychotherapist and Relationship Expert Deborah Krevalin shared her tips and tricks for couples to maintain their relationships even with contrasting politics.
“This scenario plays out in my office with working with couples all week,” she said. “If our partner doesn’t align with us on some of these big issues, it creates worry.”
Thankfully, couples can give one another grace and stay together.
Krevalin noted that it's important to respect one another’s opinions, and to prioritize disconnecting from the news. “We watch too much news, and a lot of it is not good, unhealthy, and not positive,” she noted.“Take a walk, go to Costco, make some dinner together … but decrease the amount of news that you’re watching.”
It is easy to assume that if your partner votes for the opposite party, they must stand against everything you stand for.
Politics are not black and white. You may share the same viewpoints on certain issues that one particular candidate has but despise some others.
It is time to start having these tough conversations with our partners to get to know each other even better and understand why they may have particular views we may not be able to wrap our heads around.
A vote for Trump or Biden is not necessarily a vote against you or your partner or a diss at everything you stand for. It is possible to find common ground.
The sooner we recognize it, the stronger our relationships can become.
We may even learn a new thing or two about our partners and love them even more, regardless of who we vote for.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.