The Mental Trick That Helped A Self-Help Guru Survive Maximum Security Prison
There's only one effective way to face the consequences of your own decisions.
Ground Picture / Shutterstock Imagine being unexpectedly sent to prison for six months. Imagine the confusion and anger you'd experience. Realistically, what would you do and how would you survive?
That is the predicament self-help leader Peter Sage found himself in when he was held in contempt of court for six months and sent to a maximum security prison. He recalls the wave of shock that fell upon him when he was given the sentence — because he didn't see it coming.
This is the story Peter Sage shares on a recent episode of the Open Relationship: Transforming Together podcast: How he was sent to prison, how he felt and exactly how he survived. That's how host Andrea Miller learned the one mental "trick" that helped Sage create something good out of the process of paying his debt to society.
Peter Sage saw this struggle as an opportunity to grow
Sage recalls the moment he received his sentence for contempt of court his mind was in utter disarray. So, how did he survive? He told himself, "I need to create a positive frame, that allows me to thrive instead of wilt." And that is exactly what he did.
"This is such an outlier. This is such a 'didn't see it coming' [event]!" Sage told Miller. Some could say that this experience was divinely timed and planned, that this was supposed to be a lesson learned to help him reach a higher level of understanding and growth.
So, when the universe called on him to rise to the occasion, then he had no choice but to embrace it as a divinely-ordained opportunity for maximum growth. It was also an opportunity to help others.
"Theory doesn't cover the price of admission to the higher levels of greatness."
That's one of Peter Sage's favorite sayings, and something he told one of his students in a letter from prison. It means, in essence, that you can read every book and learn every lesson about growing and becoming stronger — but you can't fully grow to those higher levels until you live through some struggles.
Sage continues that he knew he couldn't give up when faced with the biggest struggle of his life telling Miller, "you are called to practice what you teach in a way that allows you to be real about it. Not theoretical."
Miller adds that when she faces setbacks or challenges, she says, "This is mastery."
We can't control what challenges come our way. If we cannot avoid the struggle, why not make the most of it? Why not see it as an opportunity to become the highest version of yourself and build a more meaninful life?
Miller continues, "It's only on the mat, and in the rough and tumble and stress of it, [that] you able to either master that lesson or not."
Sage interjects and adds that a "graduation event" is one where you're not only challenged to grow, but where you can help others. Sage had the privilege of going into an environment where his skills and talents could be used to improve the lives and outcomes of other.
He says, "I got to go into a place where I can help people with a skill set they've probably never been able to experience — in a way that serves the greater good." And that's what he stands for.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, and family topics.