25 Behaviors That Signal Your Partner May Have A Drinking Problem
Alcohol can affect relationships in devastating ways.
Prostock-Studio | Canva You think that your partner has a drinking problem. You have tried to discuss his drinking with him but every time you bring up the issue you end up in a screaming match where he denies it and you end up feeling guilty.
Firstly, let us say that if you are asking the question and are arguing about the issue then there is a problem with alcohol affecting your relationship and you do not need to look any further for an answer.
However, if you still need some answers and signs then below we have provided some simple straightforward pointers to answer your question. If he is doing some or all of these then probably he has an alcohol problem
According to the World Health Organization, over 400 million people 15 years and older have an alcohol problem. The more of them he is doing the more likely he has a problem. So in no particular order, he probably has an addiction if he does any of these things.
Here are 25 behaviors that signal your partner may have a drinking problem:
1. Smells of alcohol, all or much of the time
Especially at inappropriate times, like the office on a Wednesday morning.
2. Hides his bottles
3. Sneaks drinks
4. Lies about how much he drinks
If he's lying about this, what else is he lying about?
5. Is drinking more than he used to
6. Is drinking more often
7. Drinks earlier in the day than he used to
8. Puts drinking before spending time with you
It's affecting your relationship, and you don't think it's going to survive.
9. Takes days off work more often
10. Is hung over in the mornings more often
11. Has mood swings if he is not drinking
12. Loses interest in intimacy
13. Behaves inappropriately in social gatherings
14. Organize outings around drinking
15. Tries to downplay the amount and impact of his drinking
16. Sometimes uncharacteristically offers to go shopping
You think you're gonna have a fun time in Target, until you see him head for the liquor section.
17. Increases the frequency of meetings with his friends in the bar
18. Frequently comes back later than planned / even skips meals altogether
19. Often shows obvious signs of drinking, slurring his speech, and unsteady on his feet
20. Forgets appointments
21. Breaks promises and does not keep commitments
22. Picks more fights or is more aggressive than before
He's getting angrier and angrier.
23. Is more defensive when alcohol is mentioned
24. Falls asleep in inappropriate and sometimes dangerous circumstances
25. Gets drunk a lot
None of these signs alone, apart from number 25, is a significant sign that he has a drinking problem. However, the more of these signs he is showing the more likely it is that he has a problem. And if he had to choose between alcohol and you, he would pick the alcohol.
Drug and alcohol addiction is incredibly common.
The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) reports that approximately 20.3 million people above the age of 12 have suffered from a substance use disorder in the past year. According to SAMHSA’s 2018 National Survey on Drug Use and Health, close to 2 million people of the same age bracket have suffered from opioid use disorders and 14.8 million from alcohol use disorders.
If you or someone you know is suffering from addiction, there are resources to get help.
The process of recovery is not linear, but the first step to getting better is asking for help. For more information, referrals to local treatment facilities and support groups, and relevant links, visit SAMHSA’s website. If you’d like to join a recovery support group, you can locate the nearest Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous meetings near you. Or you can call SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-799-7233, which is a free 24/7 confidential information service in both English and Spanish. For TTY, or if you’re unable to speak safely, call 1-800-487-4889.
John McMahon has a PhD in Psychology and was a senior lecturer on alcohol and drug studies.
Lou Lewis is a Counselor and author of the book No Easy Answers.