Mom Says Her 18-Year-Old Stepson 'Romantically' Moved In With Her 48-Year-Old Friend So She Would Pay His Phone Bill
He's just looking for someone else to take on his responsibilities while she claims that it's true love.
Pixel-Shot / Shutterstock A stepmother was left utterly disturbed after learning that her 18-year-old stepson had moved in with one of her friends.
While the son wanted to move in with her so that he could take advantage of her finances, the woman has developed real romantic feelings for the young man, who only recently became a legal adult.
The mom’s 18-year-old stepson moved in with one of her friends so that she could support him.
Sharing the unsettling story to the subreddit r/Parenting, the teen's stepmother revealed that the moment he turned 18, he chose to move out of her home.
“He doesn't like having to answer to parents,” the woman explained. According to her post, she and her husband refused to pay his cell phone bill due to his disrespectful behavior, so he decided to leave.
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Originally, the stepson moved in with his biological mother, whom he hadn’t seen in 10 years. However, after she also refused to pay his phone bill, the man took extreme measures to ensure that he wouldn’t have to be the one to pay it.
“Now I find out he has moved in with my friend who attended a family vacation in April,” the woman wrote. “Apparently, she gave him her number, and they have developed ‘feelings.’”
Although the woman knows that her stepson likely does not have feelings for her friend and just wants someone who will pay his bills, her friend is misguidedly smitten.
“She crossed such a huge boundary, and this is so weird and wrong,” the concerned stepmother added.
Others appeared to be just as disturbed by the situation as the stepmother.
“I don’t even have words for this. Wow. Absolutely disgusting. 18-year-olds are known for the dumb decisions they make … but a 48-year-old woman knows better,” one Redditor commented. “I am sorry. This has to feel like a huge betrayal and giving all of the family icks.”
“This is probably not the first time she has preyed on a much younger person during a time of vulnerable transition,” another user wrote. “He is an adult, though, at this point, but I certainly would not be associating with or defining her as a friend any longer.”
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“Hopefully, she doesn't have contact with minors as part of her job,” another user wished.
While the situation would likely be impossible for any parent to navigate through, some people offered their advice to the stepmother on what she could do moving forward.
Many people urged her not to meddle with the situation, fearing that it would only push her stepson closer to the woman out of rebellion.
“Either she’ll wake up, or he’ll get tired and move on. Trying to control or manage the situation will likely push them together even more,” one Redditor wrote. “If you want to keep a hold of him, keep it light when you speak and see him.”
“Can you send your friend a text to say, you wish them all the best on their relationship, but you'd like to take over paying for your son's cell phone bill? We know it's going to fall apart, and this just gives him a safer place to land,” another user suggested.
“If you want to make it super weird, invite them over for dinner!”
Children, no matter how old they are, often rebel against their parents when they feel controlled or threatened by them.
Once the woman’s stepson learned that his parents would no longer cater to him by paying his phone bill, he likely felt that making such a bizarre decision to live with his mother’s friend would get their attention and hopefully get him what he wanted.
Unfortunately, this behavior might be worse than just typical teen selfishness. According to PsychCentral, manipulative behavior in teens is problematic. It can manifest in a variety of ways, but in this stepmom's case, it seems to be a clear example of emotional blackmail.
He didn't get what he wanted, so he used a highly volatile, and emotional tactic to get his parents to respond.
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Sadly, the stepmother’s friend is the collateral damage. It's easy to point a finger at her as the villain, but if the genders were reversed, would the discourse change?
There is no denying that the relationship is inappropriate. Considering that she is a family friend and he is barely legal, the two are in completely different life phases that would make a romantic relationship nearly impossible. But we also don't know all the details. It's easy to fall for manipulative tactics when you are in a fragile state yourself.
The situation is not easily remedied, but PsychCentral noted that the young man's parents need to set clear boundaries and consequences for the teen as well as work to understand the root cause of the behavior to begin with. Ultimately, this isn't simply about the cell phone bill, and chances are it's been a family issue for much longer than this stepmom described.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.