Woman Shares The List Of Questions Her Dad Sent Her To Ask Her Boyfriend Before Meeting The Family
Her dad demanded that her boyfriend answer the questions honestly before he was to meet him.
Ground Picture | Shutterstock Introducing your significant other to your family can be quite a daunting experience. Not only do you want your family to like them, but you also want them to accept the fact that you two are together and happy. Of course, parents only want the best for their children and, in most circumstances, solely care about whether the person dating their child is making them happy and loving them unconditionally.
However, a woman named Uzo Njoku posted to X (formerly known as Twitter) to share that her Nigerian dad had some, frankly hilarious, conditions regarding her boyfriend before she could introduce him to the family.
A woman shared the list of questions her dad sent her to ask her boyfriend before he could meet the family.
"My dad sent me a 20-question pdf about my boyfriend that I have to answer before I can introduce them. Nigerian fathers..." Njoku shared in her post. Posting a screenshot of the list of questions, Njoku only revealed 11 of them since some of them were rather personal and invasive, but at the top of the document, her father had printed in large letters, "QUESTIONS REQUIRING HONEST AND VERITABLE ANSWERS."
Dating customs are much different in Nigeria, and meeting the family is not a casual affair.
Some of the questions in the document were rather straightforward, including, "What are important personal stories that shaped who he is today?" and "Where did he go to school, and did he graduate?" But then other questions seemed quite interesting for Njoku's dad to want to know about the man who was dating his daughter.
"Does he have a family history of diabetes mellitus, blood disorders, sickle cell disease, and cancers?" Even broader medical questions like, "Does he have past surgical procedures?" and "Does he smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol (state frequency and how many drinks per occasion), has he ever used illicit/recreational drugs?"
While most reading this would think Njoku's dad was way too involved in her dating life, it's important to remember that from a cultural perspective, meeting the family has an entirely different meaning in Nigeria than it does in the U.S.
Cultures of West Africa wrote, "In Nigeria, dating gets real when families are involved. You see, a relationship doesn’t officially start until both families meet, and it’s no casual affair. This formal introduction ceremony happens at the bride-to-be’s family home, where the groom’s family comes prepared to make their intentions known."
For Njoku's dad, asking to bring a significant other home to meet the family is basically a marriage proposal. It's well past the getting-to-know-you stage, and he seems determined to get to know anyone his daughter is dating very well before she welcomes them to a family gathering.
The woman's dad demanded to know about her boyfriend's past relationships and the women he'd been with before her.
The questions certainly didn't stop at his educational background and medical history, however. There were questions about his dating history and the number of girls that he'd been with before being with Njoku. Some of those questions included, "When did you start dating him, and how many girls has he dated prior to you?" and "Why did he break up with his last girlfriend?"
But then there were questions that Njoku's dad wanted to know about how she was being treated in the relationship, including, "What do you like the most and least about him?" and "Does he make you feel supported and safe?" Njoku found the stream of questions hilarious more than anything but also pointed out that this is something African parents, especially African dads, take seriously — wanting the best for their daughters.
It's clear from these questions that her dad loves her exponentially and wants her to be in a relationship with a man who is taking care of her, loving her, and protecting her because her well-being is the only thing that matters to him. There's also a clear cultural influence here, and while many people think African parents are just overly strict and controlling, which in some cases can be true, they also have a deep-rooted care and responsibility to make sure their children succeed in life.
Whether that's with their careers or with their love lives, there's something incredibly heartwarming about how devoted parents like that are for their kids, even if their children are in their late 20s, like Njoku.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.