To The Imperfect Moms With Messy Lives And The Weight Of The World On Their Shoulders
Motherhood is hard, and it's nothing like the way you see it on social media.
Yuganov Konstantin via Canva Hey, you.
The mom at the grocery store counter with a full cart and a screaming toddler and people eyeing you.
It’s going to be okay.
The mom who's reading this right now with a baby at your breast and a toddler unraveling your last roll of toilet paper as you worry about the knowledge that you won't get paid for another week.
It’s going to be okay.
The mom who's sitting down for one brief moment outside, smoking a cigarette in hopes of calming your nerves as your child runs through the mud in your backyard — just after you bathed him.
It’s going to be okay.
Because I have a secret to tell you, all moms struggle.
I don't care what you've heard or even seen. YOU are not alone.
I know, because I’m currently writing this while trying to soothe a sick child who's scratching my arms up and down with the fingernails I know I should have filed a week ago. And I just changed two poopy diapers that could have won gold medals in an Olympic pooping event.
I know you look at Facebook and see those other moms — those perfect moms — doing perfect things with their perfect children, and you cry.
I do that, too.
It takes all the strength I have, and that’s not a lot, to remember that they are only posting the fun times. Those moms you see perfectly done up like they're about to attend a fashion show, with children posing like they belong in an old-school Sears catalog, they have to clean up poop, too. They just don’t post it on Instagram.
I do my best. And I know you are doing yours, too.
Hey, you. The mom has tears streaming down her face because you're so exhausted you don’t know how you will go on any longer.
It’s going to be okay.
The mom who hasn’t changed out of your pajamas since the weekend.
The mom looks at the clock to see it’s 8:00 p.m. and the kids haven’t finished their homework and they’re annoyed that all you have to make for dinner is leftovers of the meal they weren't exactly thrilled about the night before.
The mom who is hiding in the closet desperately trying to get two minutes alone without a child strapped to her leg.
I know you feel alone. I know you feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. I know you have trouble sleeping at night only to wake up and face the new day and its troubles all over again.
It’s going to be okay.
You may not believe me. That’s okay, too. But I just needed you to know that you are not alone.
So keep doing what you’re doing, and know that one day, in the future, your children will grow up to realize how hard their mother worked for them. How much love, pain, and stress went into everything you did to provide the best life you could possibly give them?
And you know what? It’s going to be okay.
Liza Walter is a freelance writer who has appeared in HuffPost, BRIDES, Bust Magazine, Ravishly, and more.