Teen Catches Her Christian Mom Destroying Her Olivia Rodrigo Records Because She Curses In Her Songs
The mom's behavior left many worried for the teen's well-being.
Radiokafka | Shutterstock Parents not approving of their teens' choices in music (and pretty much everything else) is basically a rite of passage. But when a teen on TikTok posted the lengths her mom went to when she discovered her daughter's listening habits, the video left many online shocked, and some accusing the mom of traumatizing her child.
The teen's Christian mom destroyed her Olivia Rodrigo records and prayed over them.
Watching the video posted by a teen named Magdalena, you get the impression that this outsized reaction is only the tip of the iceberg of what she deals with when it comes to her mother.
Though she's visibly upset, she also can't help but laugh at her mother's over-the-top response.
"My mom found my Olivia Rodrigo vinyls and snapped them in half," Magdalena wrote in onscreen text. "I'm on the verge of a mental breakdown."
After showing the broken records, Magdalena then turned the camera to her mother, who was praying to God to save Olivia Rodrigo. "Have mercy on Olivia Rodriguez," she intoned, misstating the artist's name, "that she would repent of her sins.
The religious fanaticism exhibited in the video is shocking enough. But in a follow-up video, Magdalena shared her mother's reasons for being so upset about simple pop music, which makes it seem all the more absurd.
Her mom was upset because of the cursing in Olivia Rodrigo's songs.
Given Magdalena's mother's response, you'd think that Olivia Rodrigo was singing about truly adult themes. But as any music fan nowadays knows, Rodrigo's tunes tend to stick to stuff that resonates with teens and young people, like dating, heartache, and heartbreak. She's darn good at it too.
But to Magdalena's very Christian mother, there's one aspect of her work that is a no-go. "It's because Olivia curses in her songs," Magdalena said in a follow-up video. "It's because she said 'OMFG'" and other curse words in her songs and song titles.
Kathy Hutchins | Shutterstock
For a mom like Magdalena's, you'd think Rodrigo's outspoken political activism — she's made headlines for handing out condoms and Plan B contraceptives at her concerts, for example—would be what sends her over the edge.
But Magdalena said it's just that her mom doesn't like "secular music" (that's Evangelical Christian-speak for non-Christian music for the uninitiated). "She knows I listen to it, but she doesn't like it," Magdalena explained, "and I'm not allowed to play it or anything like that around her."
The teen and her mom have since reconciled, but many online have been left outraged by what they saw.
Magdalena explained that she tried to bargain with her mom, saying she would simply take the records back to the store instead. But her mother hauled off and snapped them anyway — hence Magdalena's shocking reaction.
Magdalena went on to say that she, too, is a Christian and that the mother-daughter differences in music have no bearing on her faith. Her mom also apologized for the incident and paid Magdalena for the records.
"We hashed it out," she said. "She takes cursing and all that stuff to a different level than I do… I still believe in God and everything… but we interpret the Bible in different ways." And she pushed back against those who suggested she retaliate and defend herself, saying that she's not a "vengeful" person.
That did little to tamp down the anger her video inspired in viewers, however, who felt her mom's actions were wildly inappropriate.
"That is abusive behavior," one person wrote. "I don’t care what their beliefs or motives are behind that. I hope you are safe."
Experts say fear-based parenting like this often leads, even if unintentionally, to emotional abuse.
From accusations of abuse to predictions that one day Magdalena will end up going no-contact with her mom, her video shocked many people who viewed it. She stated in her follow-ups that eliciting that response was not her intention.
But — full disclosure — as someone who grew up in a similar household, it's hard not to suspect her video was, even if subconsciously, a cry for help or, at the very least, commiseration.
That would be an understandable reaction, as experts like psychologists say fear-based or authoritarian parenting — which includes stunts like destroying kids' belongings — goes hand-in-hand with emotional abuse. "Destroying someone else’s property — especially things they cherish — is a way to assert dominance by making that person feel unsafe," Deanna, a Detroit-based licensed therapist, told me.
"Doing it for religious reasons can be particularly terrorizing," the therapist went on to say, "because it carries the implication that the property or its use is endangering the person's salvation. That they're basically going to go to hell for, in this case, listening to an Olivia Rodrigo record."
Psychologists say that due to the violation of trust this kind of parenting constitutes, kids parented this way often end up feeling alone and abandoned, doubting themselves and sensing that they are somehow fundamentally flawed or inferior.
They also often have deeply impaired skills when it comes to managing their own emotions. As Deanna put it, "it sets up a dynamic in which this young girl doesn’t have access to her own opinions and emotions, her own likes and dislikes, because she's afraid of reprisal."
As a person who grew up this way (it was a different era, so it was Madonna tapes I was forced to destroy), I also can't help but recognize a tell in the teen's reaction. Her defense of her mother and downplaying of the event are well-known survival instincts in people who've faced emotional abuse, or any form of abuse for that matter.
Making your child cry and laugh in shock is not normal parenting. Instilling fear in your kids is not discipline. They are cruel mind games, and playing them in the name of God is a whole other level of cruelty and destruction.
It is abuse — a word I still have trouble using in reference to my own parents nearly 30 years after escaping the home I grew up in because it seems so unbelievable that people who love you can break your brain like that. But they can and do, and nobody deserves it, for any reason, and certainly not over a collection of pop records.
In her follow-up, Magdalena said that she had her mother's permission to post their altercation and the details about it. Here's hoping her mom actually listens to and learns from the response and that Magdalena hears that she is not alone.
If you or someone you know has been a victim of child abuse, there are resources available to help. Call 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) to speak with a crisis counselor 24/7.
John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice and human interest topics.