Teenager Who Is Forced To Travel The Country In An RV With Her Parents Says She Is 'Sick Of It'—'I Want To Have A Normal Life'
It may seem glamorous and adventurous, but "VanLife" is hard for adults, let alone teens.
Julia Pavaliuk | Canva Pro Ever since the pandemic locked us all inside for months, the so-called van life trend has skyrocketed, with tons of people taking to RVs, converted vans and in some cases just regular old SUVs and living life on the open road.
But the reality of the lifestyle is often very different from what's seen online. I've done it myself, so I speak from experience. And when it's not something you've chosen but rather something you're forced to do by your parents, like a teen who recently posted their experience to Reddit, it's a whole different ballgame.
The teen hates living the 'van life' and resents her parents for making her do it.
Living in an RV or converted van of sorts is nothing new. Books like "Into the Wild" highlighted the culture way back in the 1990s. But it really did explode with the onset of the pandemic. In just the first two years, van lifers rose by 65%, from 1.9 million in 2020 to 3.1 million in 2022.
The lack of strings, sense of adventure, and access to the wide open spaces of nature make van life seem idyllic to many. The social media clout that comes with it can be incredibly lucrative, too.
But as always, all that media attention has a dark side. And a teen on Reddit has found herself trapped in the middle of her parents' combination of wanderlust and ambition. "I’m the kid of one of those traveling RV families online," she wrote in her Reddit post, "and I hate them for it every day."
The teen said her parents are constantly filming her, she has no friends or privacy and is desperate to get away from her parents.
The teen wrote that she was forced at age 7 to embark on her parents' RV life adventure. Her dad works remotely, and her mom is a content creator, so she has no choice but to be part of it all.
She wrote that her mom is "big enough that we get recognized sometimes... and I’ve had a camera shoved in my face for as long as I can remember."
That has them at their wit's end. "I’ve gotten enough attention already, and I'm sick of it," she wrote, adding, "I hate them for treating me like some pet they can just drag along in their plans rather than their child." But her anger goes far beyond merely being sick of the attention. Her situation frankly borders on forms of neglect.
Education is clearly not a priority to her parents. After being homeschooled her entire childhood, she then switched to online school "at my own insistence for high school" so that she has some hope of a future and can hopefully attend college.
She also has no privacy or space — just a bunk bed she's long since outgrown and a curtain divider. But probably far more damaging is the profound isolation in which she lives.
"I’m an 18-year-old girl, I don’t have a single friend in person because the longest I’ve ever stayed anywhere is a month," she wrote. And she's desperate to get away from her parents, but has no means to. "I don’t have a job and no way to get one because of not being stationary."
I have lived the 'van life' lifestyle. It is far harder than it looks, and no place for kids.
In 2021, I hit the road in my trusty Honda CR-V for three months of van life — or SUV and a tent life, as it were — all over the Western U.S. I did it again for about two months in 2022.
Courtesy of the Author
Both were magical experiences. The things I've seen, the hikes I've taken, the rivers I've swum in, the gorgeous places I've slept under the stars, and the people I've met along the way truly changed me forever. (I'm writing a book about it and everything, per the aforementioned van life narcissism!)
But even in the short stints I did, van life was incredibly — at times crushingly — hard. The lack of any anchor, sometimes suffocating loneliness, exposure to the elements and arduous logistical difficulty of doing everything from laundry to taking a shower. And my God, the CONSTANT need to buy ice frequently takes a toll on your sanity.
Courtesy of the Author
For me, it was worth it. When I had to buy a new car earlier this year, I made sure to get one with even more space so I could camp in the back like the weird hippy nomad I am.
But here's the thing: I'm a 45-year-old single man with no attachments — not a parent. And I'm certainly not a growing, developing child. I can't imagine enduring even a summer of van life as a teen, let alone years and years.
The bottom line is that, even if unintentionally, this teen is being neglected in the name of her parent's social media clout.
That may sound extreme, but depriving kids of friends, space, and proper education is literally considered neglect and abuse by mental health and social services professionals because of the way they hinder multiple facets of a child's mental, emotional, and intellectual development. And forcing them to star in your constant social media videos is exploitation on top of it.
But it seems clear that this girl's parents are too taken with their own adventure to even take their daughter seriously. "I’ve had conversations with them about all of this countless times, and they are so delusional and genuinely believe that 'a nomadic existence is the best way to live.'"
It might be. But not for a kid. Several commenters on Reddit even went so far as to recommend she contact services for runaways. One commenter who said they work for 1-800-RUNAWAY wrote that "we help people like you every day," showing that this teen is not alone in this incredibly twisted situation.
Kids are human beings who need stability and care in order to grow. They're not props in your social media videos or inconveniences to be managed on your lifelong vacation. And when they tell you their needs, you need to listen, not ignore them.
Kids deserve better — and your adventures in narcissism can wait until your retirement.
John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice, and human interest topics.