Teenage Son Doesn't Want His Mom's Extended Family Moving In With Them Despite Their 'Hard Life' Because They Didn't Care When His Dad Left
The mom is being called "selfish" and "ungrateful" for not helping them out.
Egoitz Bengoetxea / Shutterstock A mother was put in a difficult situation when her estranged family members reached out to her, asking if they could move in after falling on hard times.
When the mother consulted about the matter with her teenage son, he was against the idea, given their family members’ poor treatment of them when the woman’s husband and the boy’s father abandoned them.
The woman’s teenage son does not want their extended family members to move in with them since they never offered a helping hand when his father left.
Sharing her story to Reddit, the woman revealed that when her son was 11 years old, her husband cheated on her and walked out on the family.
“It was an incredibly difficult time. I was left alone to raise our son,” she wrote. “None of my family members offered any help or support. We were essentially on our own.”
According to the woman, the only person who offered them support was her father, who was there for them financially and emotionally.
“When my father passed away two years ago, he left me a significant inheritance,” the woman shared. “This money allowed me to buy a house and provide a stable and comfortable life for my son and me.”
Throughout the years, the woman’s bond with her son grew since the two of them survived so much together. “I would do anything for him,” the proud mom reported.
Petrenko Andriy / Shutterstock
Recently, some of the woman’s extended family members have fallen on hard times and turned to her for help.
“[They] asked if they could move in with us,” the woman wrote. However, given their complicated history, the woman hesitated and consulted with her 16-year-old son.
“He was very much against the idea,” she shared. “He remembers how nobody was there for us when we needed them the most and feels strongly that they shouldn't benefit from our home now.”
“Understanding his feelings and valuing his comfort, I decided to tell my family that they couldn't move in with us.”
The woman’s family members did not react well to her decision and accused her of being “selfish” and “ungrateful.”
“They say that I owe them support because we’re family,” she wrote.
However, as a mother, the woman believes that her son’s comfort and happiness come before any family member's requests.
Most people agreed that the woman did right by her son, and was not obligated to give anything to her family members.
“Maybe if they'd helped you and your son back then, he'd feel a lot more positive and want to help them in return,” one Redditor suggested. “They made their choice then; they can live with the consequences now.”
“By their own reasoning, then, they aren’t family since they refused to support you. Screw people who only take and never give back,” another user noted.
“You can't have your back turned on family in their time of need but go running to them with your tail between your legs when you're in a tough position yourself. Karma sure works well when we least expect it,” another user commented.
“I'm happy for you and your son becoming close and having a good relationship. It shows what a great mother you are to not only ask for what he wants but to really take his advice and show him his opinion matters.”
Family drama can be difficult to navigate, but prioritizing what's best for your child is most important.
No one would argue that it takes a village to raise a family, but what happens when times are hard, and that village is suddenly deserted? In the case of this mom and her son, they turned to the loving support of her father and forged a path on their own. It's no wonder they are hesitant to offer support to those who were not around.
And ultimately, it's their choice to do so.
As VeryWellFamily noted, to ensure the health of your kids and the health of your relationship with your kids, you need to prioritize them over other obligations. This teen would be unhappy if their estranged family moved in, and that's what matters.
While it is unfortunate that the woman’s family has fallen on hard times, it is not her responsibility to provide for them especially after their lack of support when she needed them the most — although they are family.
At the end of the day, it shouldn’t matter if you are blood-related. If they were not with you through your worst, they should not turn back up at your best.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.