Stepmom Asks If She’s Wrong For Financially Nacho-ing Her Husband’s Kids — 'I’m Done Paying His Child Support'
She wants to prioritize her own happiness and remove herself from her husband and his ex-wife's drama.
fizkes | Shutterstock "I finally made the decision to focus on me and let my husband take care of his own kids because I just, I cannot," mom and content creator @thelakefamily6 admitted on TikTok.
She claimed that she was no longer willing to serve anything in her life that didn't serve her back — including her husband's family affairs. Nacho-ing was her solution.
The stepmom decided to start financially nacho-ing her husband's kids.
According to the woman, "Nacho-ing is pretty much like a blunt 'not your kids, not your problem,' unless it's a safety concern."
This new mindset means she will focus on herself and her biological kids and allow her husband to take care of his own children, particularly financially.
She explained that she has no energy to focus on children that aren't hers, as she's currently taking classes and applying for Physician Assistant school. So, she told her husband just that: She cannot be responsible for his kids, and he needs to handle it.
"I'm no longer helping him financially with his kids. I'm no longer paying for appointments, paying for insurance ... That's my husband's. If he can't afford it, then he can't afford it," she said. "I make six figures. I can afford it, but because of so much drama ... I need to worry about myself and focus on my career and focus on my kids."
She has two biological children, and in the past, she admitted to putting them on the "backburner" to deal with her husband's family drama. But she's no longer willing. Since removing herself from the situation, she shared she feels "amazing."
The stepmom acknowledged that her decision hurt her husband.
“Does it hurt my husband? Yes, it does,” she admitted. “It hurts him financially as well.”
In June, she explained that her husband's court date for child support got pushed back until September, so until then, he's still required to pay the full amount, which is a challenge. Her husband only makes half of the amount of money that he made while in the military, and as a retired service member, he lives on a fixed income.
"I feel bad for him, but I'm not helping him pay for his child support," she strongly stated. "But now he's getting drama and backlash from his ex-wife."
"I told my husband this can't be my problem," she continued. "I love you to death, but this can't be my problem."
This woman has every right to remove herself from the drama between her husband and his ex-wife, and she certainly does not have to pay the child support he owes. In fact, according to Nolo, a publisher of legal information, a "new partner usually has no legal obligation to support your children from a prior relationship."
This doesn't mean she doesn't love her stepchildren or won't be supportive in other ways, but she can't keep depleting her own energy to do so. She has every right to set boundaries to protect herself and her biological children.
"My money is my money," she stated. “So I have just been focusing on my glow-up and my mental health and just being spiritually and physically healthy.” She added that since nacho-ing her husband's kids, she feels “like a weight off of [her] shoulders has been lifted.”
She clarified that she's not abandoning her husband or stepkids.
"I'm not abandoning my husband just because I'm disengaging," she insisted. "Disengaging and abandonment are two different things."
The woman highlighted that her husband is nowhere near a deadbeat father and is capable of caring for his children. She explained that she is simply "relinquishing all of the drama" she has dealt with, something necessary to save her marriage and heal herself.
She also clarified that she loves her stepchildren, but has "gone above and beyond" and done a lot for them that she shouldn't have as a stepparent.
"If my husband's ex-wife were to give up her rights, I would adopt those kids in a heartbeat," she added. "Those are the loves of my life. I love my stepkids. They will never go without. I promise you, they'll never go without."
However, it's her husband's responsibility to provide for them — not hers.
Despite negative comments from viewers and people in her life who don't agree with her decision, she stands by it, admitting that for the first time in a long time, she's truly happy. She's choosing to prioritize herself and her biological kids, and it's serving her well.
"I will not apologize for living in my truth," she stated, "because I finally am happy. I'm glowing."
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.