11 Phrases People Use When They Were Raised By Classy Parents

Children of classy parents have a way about them that shows both kindness and grace.

Written on Apr 15, 2025

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Most of our behaviors, values, and morals can be traced back to the way that our parents raised us and the environment in which we were brought up. The way we carry ourselves, how we speak, how we treat others, and even how we respond to conflict have all been things that our parents may have modeled for us. That's why there's a bit of quiet elegance to those raised by classy parents.

It's not that they're stuck-up, snobby, or yearning to impress everyone they come across; in fact, it's actually the opposite. Along with the phrases people use when they were raised by classy parents, they were also taught the importance of having kindness and grace in every situation they manage to find themselves in. Their thoughtfulness and empathy make them caring and passionate friends, reliable co-workers, and warm human beings who light up any relationship they're in. They don't just seek attention, they earn respect as well.

Here are 11 phrases people use when they were raised by classy parents

1. 'Please and thank you go a long way'

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It might sound like common sense, but individuals raised by classy parents were brought up in a household where basic manners were not only expected but reinforced as being a direct reflection of your character. This phrase highlights the fact that the way you choose to treat others has a way of coming back on you.

If you're saying things like "please" and "thank you," it shows others that you value both their time and presence, which never goes unnoticed. "Good manners, on the other hand, are a reflection of the Golden Rule: if you are nice to me, I'll be nice to you," explained neuroscientist and professor Paul J. Zak, PhD. "The Golden Rule exists in every culture on the planet."

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2. 'It's not what you say, it's how you say it'

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Though perhaps a bit overused, this is one of the phrases people use when they were raised by classy parents, as it indicates that the words you use to talk to someone else may not matter, but if you say it in a rude, condescending, or irate way, that person will always take it based on the tone and inflection you use.

You may have good intentions when you speak, but if you're using a harsh voice, those good intentions can simply be overshadowed. 

As clinical psychologist Susan Krauss Whitbourne, PhD explained, "Being aware of the tone of your voice as well as the specific emphasis you give to certain words is an important but unrecognized contributor to good relationships. Finding the right balance can ensure that your language conveys your intended meanings, smoothing the way for greater fulfillment through your communication."

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3. 'Always write a thank you note'

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There's nothing that shows kindness more than acknowledging a good thing that someone did for you by expressing that gratitude through a thank you note. It shows that you're not only thinking of that person, but that you genuinely appreciate the time and effort they set aside when it came to their specific actions.

Classy parents made sure that their kids were being raised under the belief that gratitude wasn't just something people with good manners exhibited, but that it was also important to building long-lasting and important relationships.

Research published in Psychological Science even found that people often underestimate the power of gratitude. Being grateful is incredibly good for your health, mood, and general well-being. It's even the easiest way to improve your mental health.

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4. 'Dress for the occasion'

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People raised by classy parents learned the importance of wardrobe and the types of clothes that should be worn for different occasions. Now, as adults, these individuals have a deep understanding of the kinds of attire that are required for the events they go to.

Our clothing choices have a direct influence on how others perceive us and the first impressions that we end up leaving on those we encounter. Whether it's a formal dinner, a casual lunch date with friends, or even a day at the office, these individuals are more than aware that their clothing can make a statement.

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5. 'If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all'

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People who were raised by classy parents are aware that nothing good comes from saying something rude or offensive. This principle is something they take very seriously, because if they know nothing they're thinking can add to a conversation in a positive manner, they simply keep it to themselves.

The only thing that can come from saying something to hurt someone's feelings is damaging a relationship and causing unnecessary conflict. This phrase reinforces the idea that not every thought that comes through in your mind needs to be voiced out loud. In fact, it might be helpful to think about how you would feel if someone said the thing you're thinking to you, and therefore, you shouldn't say it to someone else.

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6. 'You never get a second chance to make a first impression'

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Coming from a place of wisdom, the phrases people use when they were raised by classy parents includes the way others perceive them. First impressions truly are everything. It sets up the foundation for how any relationship you'll ever have will go, and people will always remember how you've presented yourself to them upon a first meeting.

"People are evolutionarily wired to make snap judgments and quick decisions about others. These initial impressions may be based on very limited information, but they can affect how people see each other, set the tone for future interactions, and leave a lasting mark on how people view one another," explained psychology educator Kendra Cherry.

People raised by classy parents understand the importance of first impressions and that you truly don't get a second chance to meet someone. It's not about being perfect but about being your authentic self and showing both respect and confidence.

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7. 'Always leave a place better than you found it'

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This phrase embodies the importance of having responsibility, especially when it comes to someone else's space. Individuals raised by classy parents were taught that when they come into any situation, they should leave it improved in whatever way that means. Whether it's with just a smile, a thoughtful gesture, or even a kind action.

"Life in our world today is challenging and, at times, overwhelming. It takes so little to be kind, considerate, and understanding of others," insisted education expert and professor Barbara Jaffe. People raised with this mindset have a way of bringing kindness and care into any room they enter, and are honestly a breath of fresh air.

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8. 'Speak when spoken to, but don't interrupt'

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One of the phrases people use when they were raised by classy parents emphasizes the importance of what a healthy and respectful conversation looks like. Individuals brought up by classy parents learned that it's not just about expressing your ideas, but being an active listener and making sure the other person has enough room to speak as well. Interrupting someone is the highest form of disrespect, even if you don't always mean to do it.

"Consciously or not, most people feel disrespected when not allowed to finish what they're saying," pointed out personal coach Marty Nemko, PhD. "You appear egotistical and seem to believe the other person is inferior. Interrupting implies that you deem your words more worthy than the remainder of what the other person has to say."

It's all about creating an environment where everyone can feel heard and respected for what they have to say, which children of classy parents understand wholly.

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9. 'Never arrive empty-handed'

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People with classy parents know about this unspoken, yet spoken, rule when it comes to arriving at a party, housewarming event, or anything other occasion where hospitality is being extended. Showing up with a thoughtful gift means that you're acknowledging the effort that was put in by the host to invite you into their space to celebrate whatever the event might be.

It doesn't have to be something extravagant, either. It can be a simple bottle of wine, a bouquet of flowers, a dessert, or even a framed photo. It's not about the price tag but about the consideration behind the gesture.

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10. 'Punctuality is a sign of respect'

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Being on time is something that was ingrained in children of classy parents. When you arrive late somewhere, you're essentially telling the other person that you don't value their time and effort, especially if they've been waiting for you for some time. Individuals raised with this mindset are aware that punctuality isn't just an idea but a sign of respect.

Their time management skills are on par because they never want someone else to feel as if they are being disrespectful and inconsiderate with their time. At this point, for them, being punctual isn't just a habit but a basic form of courtesy.

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11. 'Don't flaunt, elevate others instead'

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This phrase is grounded in being humble and not trying to show off in front of others, especially at the expense of people feeling inferior. People raised with this idea believe that flaunting the things they have and displaying arrogance over confidence will get them nowhere in life and won't create healthy dynamics with others.

Instead, these individuals are aware that the real power comes from being able to elevate others and celebrate their achievements instead of making everything about themselves. By displaying this kind of behavior, they're actively showing people that being successful and happy is not a competition.

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Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.

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