8 Old-Fashioned Gestures Great Parents Use To Show Their Kids They Adore Them
Classic ways to show love to children.
hipokrat | Canva Love keeps people together and makes us feel safe, hopeful, and happy. We all gain from love, whether we give it or receive it. Sometimes, life gets hard, and we feel rushed. Worry and anger consume us, and we begin using up all of our emotional energy. As a result, we forget to let love fill our hearts and lives as it should.
Kids, however, need consistent reinforcement that they are loved. This doesn't always have to be done with words (though words are important, too), it can also be done with old-fashioned gestures and acts of love parents can use to show their kids they adore them.
Smiling at them and looking in their eyes when you arrive home from work or pick them up from school is a powerful way to show your child you love and adore them without words.
Here are old-fashioned gestures great parents use to show their kids they adore them:
1. Practice patience
Did anyone else get up at 4 a.m.? Or do you need to change the sheets in the middle of the night? When things like this happen, I can start to feel angry. I quickly forgive myself and my kids, move on, and accept the challenge.
As a result, I can parent with more love, patience, and joy, and I'm sure my kids will feel more loved because of it. When I start the day this way, I can receive and give love better.
"This often means that parents must begin by learning about feelings, why they matter, and how to go about working through their feelings before they can help their children work through theirs," advised parenting coach Judith Pinto. "In the end, raising children to become emotionally intelligent adults who feel loved, value emotions, and know how to work through their feelings is the achievable outcome."
2. Eat dinner around a table
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I'm often guilty of giving my kids their plates at the table while I grab a quick bite in the kitchen. I rush back to do the dishes, prepare food for the next meal, or do some other odd job at the counter.
When I take the time to sit down with my kids and eat with them, I always, always enjoy the meal more. I know they also like it when we all eat together. It's a simple way to be there for them and show them I care enough to put everything else on hold, even if it's just for 10 minutes, as supported by research in The International Journal of Behavioral Nutrition and Physical Activity.
3. Speak to them softly
Having a soft tone is about more than just our voices. It's also about how we move and how we look. I'm sure that speaking to our kids in a soft voice makes a difference and helps them feel our love.
Family coach T-Ann Pierce expanded on the idea of speaking softly, "No matter how drained, frustrated, or flustered you feel, kind words are cheap and cheerful. They demonstrate appreciation, love, and safety. And kids who feel valued thrive. They make better choices. They enjoy a greater level of self-worth and confidence. With one kind word, your relationship with your child expands. It models that, no matter how exhausted someone feels, it is important to show appreciation. It models that, even if you’ve messed up, you're still loveable. It models that, even if the world is a scary place, your child is safe."
4. Get on the floor and laugh with them
So often, we can become like drill sergeants of the home. Do you seem to constantly give orders: "Eat your food, put on your shoes, and pick up your toys." I'm sure you have felt this way before.
Try making funny faces, telling jokes, playing games, or just laughing — your children just might respond to you very differently. It can be hard, especially if you're not used to that kind of humor and have many other things on your mind, but I know it's worth the effort.
Laughter is an excellent way for love to flow.
5. Give them more attention than your phone
We don't always hear what our kids say because we're often preoccupied with something else and are not paying attention.
Challenge yourself to listen more, listen better, and ask for clarity if you don't understand or hear something. Even in a hurry, take a moment, and turn around to face them, so they have your undivided attention. When someone gives you their full attention, that's how my kids will feel.
6. Play pretend
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Now, I'm not saying that we should always play with our kids. And I don't even mean that it has to be all pretend play where you have to be a princess all the time (or, in my case, a Transformer).
But having a race to the car, using your index finger as a little character to give directions, turning meal prep into a "Cooking Show," or turning instructions into a song can lighten the mood and bring some smiles.
Children love to play, and pediatric research from The American Academy of Pediatrics showed that when we play with them, we show them we care about who they are and what they like.
7. Create a secret handshake
High fives, quick shoulder rubs, hugs, and secret handshakes. Without saying it, these small actions show kids you care about them and are there for them.
8. Let them make mistakes
Let's not hold it against them when they trip, spill, knock things over, refuse to eat your home-cooked meals, hit, and do other things that kids do. Let's love them, show them how to do better next time, and give them a chance to make up for their mistake.
When we expect our kids to be perfect, we don't accept them for who they are, flaws and all. We should love ourselves and our children no matter what mistakes we make.
The tone of our relationship, which we hope will be loved now and in the future, is set by how we react to mistakes or bad decisions.
"Yes, we hate to see them hurt, but discomfort leads to change. Our kids' mistakes are simply steps along a learning curve they must navigate as they journey to adulthood. If we think of their (and our) flawed moments as learning moments, we'll feel a lot happier and they'll turn out a lot healthier and more resilient," explained parenting coach Kathryn Brown Ramsperger.
Sidhharrth Kumaar is an astro-numerologist and Founder of NumroVani. He couples his knowledge of modern sciences to solve real-world problems in the areas of mental well-being and relationship growth.