Mom Makes Her 12-Year-Old Son Take Her On Dates To Teach Him To Be A Good Partner

She said she wants to teach her son how to be a gentleman to women once he starts dating.

mom and son taking picture together eating at restaurant frantic00 | Shutterstock
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A mom is refusing to let backlash and criticism keep her from raising her 12-year-old son with good morals, especially when it comes to how he treats the person with whom he eventually gets into a relationship. 

A 31-year-old San Diego-based mom and content creator named Melissa Anne Marie shared a tradition that she started with her tween son to teach him the importance of etiquette and manners when it comes to dating. However, viewers had mixed reactions to the tradition.

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A mom makes her son take her on 'dates' to teach him how to be a good partner.

"I started doing this thing with my son, who is now 12. I give him $50, and once a month, he gets to take his mom out on a date," Marie began in her video. She explained that it's become a nice way to spend some one-on-one time with her son in a thoughtful manner.

Marie even lets her son plan their time together. As a single mother, Marie is determined to make sure that her son is growing up with the necessary tools and skills that he needs to be a gentleman and, when the time is right, treat that special person with the same care and attention that he treats his mother on these dates. 

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@melissaannmariee GRWM for a date with my boy 🥹 I heard about this idea from another teen/pre-teen boy mama and weve done this a handful of times now. We always have the best time with it! Basically you give them an allowance ($50) and they take you out on a date. The idea is you are prepping them for how to take a girl out on a date in the future so they aren’t completely lost when the time comes. So you help them along the way with how to plan and execute a date and you teach them basic etiquette and manners.And while you are teaching them, you get quality time with them which is the best part.What did he learn last night?! -to open the doors for me -not to walk ahead of your date-pay attention to their preferences with things (ex. ask where they want to sit in the movies— not just where YOU want) -pulled my chair for me -learned to give a waiter a non-verbal cue & signal for the check -learned how to pay for everything all on his own- to get creative and thoughtful with not a lot to spend 👏🏼 He planned a really fun one and i enjoyed teaching him these things and getting some one on one time together.I can’t wait to do this again! Trying to teach my boy all of these things so he can be the best partner for someone someday 🤍 #boymom #boymomlife #parentsofteens #motherhood #sandiego #fyp #parentingtips #gentleman ♬ original sound - Melissa Ann Marie

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The dates are entirely planned by her son and are designed to teach him money management as well as social etiquette. 

Marie insisted that putting the responsibility to plan the dates on her son teaches him to be thoughtful and creative when it comes to planning dates in the future. 

She acknowledged that $50 isn't really that much money, but she wanted to stress the importance of not needing a lot of money to have a good time with someone.

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"I always encourage him to have fun with it, so let's see what he comes up with," Marie continued. Pulling up to an AMC theater with her son, their first stop was seeing a movie, where he spent a total of $14 on their tickets to see "Beetlejuice Beetlejuice." After the movie, Marie and her son walked over to a restaurant, where he even pulled her chair out for her as they sat down to eat.

Marie and her son chatted over dinner. She made sure to teach him how to be assertive, including flagging down the server for the bill when they were ready to go. At the restaurant, Marie's son spent $21 of his $50 budget, but their night wasn't over. 

The next and final stop was a boba shop for dessert, where he spent $8 on drinks for both him and his mom. At the end of the night, Marie's son had spent $43 in total, and she emphasized how "proud' she was of him.

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Despite Marie's good intentions, she faced accusations of fueling a 'toxic' bond with her son by going on these 'dates.'

The outings that Marie and her son go on are no different than a dad taking his son out to teach him how to be a good partner, which is the entire point of Marie and her son's mother-son dates. 

She's spending quality time with her son and providing him with good experiences and lessons that he can continue to use as he gets older.

There's nothing nefarious about it, but Marie still faced criticisms that calling these outings a "date" was "odd" and that she was fueling a "toxic" relationship with her son

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Marie responded to some of this backlash by doubling down on the time she spends with her son. She pointed out that it's more than just going to see a movie or grabbing a bite to eat. It's about instilling values that are important when cultivating relationships.

"For someone like myself or my son who has a healthy, safe, open, communicative family dynamic, it's not weird at all," Marie said. "I'm not afraid to teach my son these things. I think it's important for him to learn this stuff."

At the end of the day, it's clear that Marie and her son have a healthy bond, and she's simply trying to teach him how to be a gentleman. 

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There's nothing wrong with wanting her son to grow up understanding respect, kindness, and how to treat others with care and compassion.

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Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.