Mom Discovers Her Daughter Has Not Gone To A Single One Of Her College Classes All Year And Was ‘Just Having Fun’ Instead
She was shocked to find out that her daughter was wasting her money.
fizkes / Shutterstock College students are known to do some pretty crazy things. Nevertheless, they’re still just that — students.
One mom thought her daughter was the same until she found out she lied to her and did not actually attend any of her college classes.
A young woman chose to have fun instead of going to her college classes, even though her mom was paying.
An anonymous mother posted on Reddit and asked for advice after she found out her daughter had been lying to her for nearly a year.
“My daughter is now 21, and I found out the past two semesters, she was just having fun and didn’t attend a single class, withdrawing from all of her classes near the end of the semester so I wouldn’t get a refund notification,” she said.
To keep up the ruse, this woman’s daughter went to some pretty intense lengths. “When I asked for her grades or how classes were going, she would give me fake info, sending edited photos of grades and making up elaborate lies on what she did in her classes,” the mom stated. “She finally came clean when I asked for her login credentials.”
Surprisingly, this wasn't the first time this happened to this student. There is one important distinction, though.
“This time, she did it, and by her own admission, she was overwhelmingly lazy,” her mom said. “The last time this happened, she had stated it was because she was depressed.”
Photo: cottonbro studio / Pexels
According to the mother, “This also happened a couple of years ago when she failed two semesters (didn’t even bother to withdraw). I paid for her to go to intensive therapy for a year from age 19 to 20 and am shocked that this behavior continues.”
“She did give me a heartfelt, sobbing apology,” she continued. “But she has done this [kind] of speech the last time she did this, to no change, and I feel like it could be an attempt to manipulate me.”
Now, the mother is at her wit’s end. “I am a widow and have raised her alone since she was two,” she said. “She attends college in another state, and I’ve since withdrawn her from college.”
It’s important to react appropriately when your child lies to you.
Psychology Today wrote about what to do when your child lies to you, regardless of age. “The best you can do as a parent is to keep yourself from overreacting to your child’s lies,” the publication noted. “If you overreact, then you are just building a bigger barrier between you and your child feeling safe to open up to you.”
Psychology Today also stressed the importance of calmly discussing versus lecturing and “not using a judgmental tone.”
Fellow Reddit users had an interesting take on the situation.
Most Redditors who commented on the post were in agreement — it was time for this woman’s daughter to be responsible for herself.
“Let her take a year, two, or three to figure out who she is and what she wants to do with her life,” one person said. “When she’s older and more mature, she can go back to school if/when she’s ready.”
“You’ve sent her to college twice,” said another. “If she wants to go back, she can do it on her own dime and her own steam. In the meantime, she’s 21, which means it’s up to her to make her own choices.”
Reddit users were clearly of one opinion. Maybe the woman’s daughter just isn’t ready for college, and that’s okay. If she’s determined, she can still have a successful life. There’s no reason she can’t go on to do great things.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news, and human interest topics.