Eldest Teen Told To ‘Check His Attitude’ After Crying When His Parents Announced They're Pregnant With Their 8th Child — ‘What If We Can't Afford Food?’
He's concerned about his family's finances and his own future.
Alexander_Safonov | Shutterstock A 16-year-old boy admitted that he was both concerned and unhappy at the revelation that he'd soon be getting a new sibling. He claimed that his parents are oblivious to the toll that each added family member takes on him as the eldest.
Instead of being sympathetic or, at the very least, reassuring, they told the teen to "check his attitude."
The teen became upset when his parents announced that they were pregnant with their 8th child.
He explained in his Reddit post that his parents have seven kids, ranging from the youngest, Robbie, who is just 4 years old, to the oldest, the Reddit poster, who is 16.
"They only ever intended to have two kids," he wrote, adding that even with only two kids, his family would still struggle.
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The teen admitted that his parents don't have great jobs and barely make enough money to cover all of the expenses related to their kids. He added that their large and growing family also lives in a small and cramped house.
For years, the burden has fallen on the Reddit poster as the oldest sibling. At the age of 13, he got a job just to cover the things he needed, like a laptop for school. He consistently babysits his siblings and takes care of most household responsibilities. While his parents do receive government assistance, it often doesn't go a long way because of how poorly they budget their finances.
Eldest children can sometimes become like parents to their little siblings. This phenomenon is called parentification, which is when a child is forced to take on adult responsibilities or a parental role that's inappropriate for their developmental stage. This can lead to feelings of depression, anxiety, and self-esteem issues.
"My parents swore they were done [having kids] with Robbie and they'd get us back on track," he continued. "I thought they were serious and I started to think about my future. I'd love to learn to cook better and work in a restaurant. Not college exactly because we could never afford it and my grades aren't good enough, but something."
Unfortunately, this optimistic attitude didn't last long, as his parents soon broke their promise.
His parents told him to 'check his attitude' when he started crying at the news of his new sibling.
Sitting the family down, his mom revealed that she was 14 weeks pregnant. The rest of his siblings were surprised, but the 16-year-old began to cry at the news despite not usually showing emotion in this way.
"My parents got so angry at me and told me to check my attitude," he recalled. "I told them they gave me this attitude by being so reckless and putting so much on me, and now they've broken their promise, and we're going to struggle even more than before."
"I know people say that having money isn't as important as long as you have a loving family and maybe that's true for some people. But mine feel like a weight I have to carry and not something I'm blessed with," he continued. "They're a responsibility on me, a burden really. And maybe that's awful to say but it's how I really feel."
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Raising children in this economy is undeniably expensive. In the U.S., the average cost of raising a child from birth to age 18 is $237,482, according to one 2023 study. And that's just the price of the "bare bones" expenses like rent, food, and childcare. Multiply that by eight, and it's truly no wonder this family's finances are in trouble.
However, this burden should never fall on a child. At his age, this Reddit poster shouldn't have to worry about his family's financial situation or their ability to afford groceries. He shouldn't feel responsible for his siblings or like a parent in any way.
Those are responsibilities of the adults in his life, and if his parents can't afford to look after the children they have, then they definitely shouldn't be having any more.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.