15 Annoying (But Sweet) Signs Your Mom Is The Exact Mom You Needed
Your mom's annoying traits show that she cares.
Anastasia Shuraeva / Pexels There’s an undeniable link between mothers and their children.
An inherent truth of motherhood is found in the saying “A mother’s work is never done.” For better or worse, our moms will always see us as their kids, no matter how old we are.
Often, our moms know us better than we know ourselves, which can be as frustrating as it is comforting.
Here are 15 annoying but sweet signs your mom is the exact mom you need.
1. Your mom annoys you.
Ask any teenager about their mom, and they’ll tell you how annoying she is. Whether she’s asking you to clean your room for the hundredth time or setting an early curfew, it’s easy to roll your eyes and ignore her.
It’s entirely developmentally appropriate for teens to push back against their parents; doing so is a sign that they’re figuring out their place in the world and who they want to be.
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You might feel like your mom is constantly on your back about one thing or another, but one day you’ll thank her, for being caring and attentive and helping you grow up into the person you are now.
2. Your mom pushes you when no one else does.
Our moms are our greatest cheerleaders. From our first steps to our last day of school, who else beams with such deep pride at all our accomplishments?
A major part of being built-in support systems means that our moms push us to take risks, even when we’re scared. They make us try things we don’t think we can do, like jumping into the deep end of the pool, literally and figuratively.
A huge part of growth is getting out of our comfort zones and being okay with the experience of discomfort. Your mom might challenge you to try things you don’t think you can do because she knows how strong and capable you really are.
Even if you fail, you’ll have gained a new experience, and your mom will love you for trying your hardest.
3. Your mom knocks on your door and checks on you multiple times a day.
A teenager’s room is their sanctuary, a safe space where they can express themselves and find moments of peace in an often overwhelming world.
If your mom is anything like mine was when I was growing up, she knocks on your door but doesn’t wait to come in, which of course, leads to high-pitch screeching and demands that she get out, like, now.
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It might feel like an invasion of privacy, but if your mom is constantly checking on you, it’s because she’s invested in your well-being and wants to be involved in your life.
4. Your mom wants to know where you’re going at all times.
If you can’t leave the house without your mom knowing your exact plan, that means your mom is watching out for you at all times, even when you're out of her sight.
This mom-move might feel overprotective or overbearing, but it means she holds your safety in high regard. My own mother still wants to know my whereabouts, even though we live in different states and I’m edging closer and closer to middle age.
I like to think this trait is part of her internal mapping: Knowing where I am in the world makes her feel more at ease.
5. Your mom needs text updates.
The advent of cell phones has made us simultaneously more independent and more connected. Cell phones also mean that your mom can close the gap in the time-space continuum and be in touch with you 24/7.
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My mom blows up my texts to tell me about the birds she sees in the backyard or the recipe she cooked for dinner that she thinks I should make, too. She texts me links to news stories I will never read (sorry, Ma!) Sometimes she texts me a photo of nothing — literally nothing — because her thumb is covering the lens.
She expects me to text her at least once a day, just so she knows where I am, and that wherever I am, I’m okay. There are times that I forget or choose not to respond. Those are the times that she sends a text that reads, “Hello daughter, this is your mother,” and waits for an answer.
Our moms text us for the same reasons that our moms barged into our bedrooms when we were teens: They want to foster closeness and have some access to our inner worlds.
6. Your mom talks to your teachers.
It’s possible that the idea of student-teacher conferences leaves you with a sense of dread, as the delineation between your home life and your school life collapses.
If your mom is the kind of mom who gets in touch with your teachers, it’s normal for that to feel kind of, well, embarrassing. Yet she’s modeling how to advocate for yourself while keeping your best interests at the forefront of the conversation.
A 2016 study from the US Department of Education found that parent-teacher communication increases students' motivation and success. When your mom talks to your teachers, she's helping set you up for academic success.
7. Your mom worries about your worries.
Anxiety is one of those things that feels bigger the more you hold it in. Sharing your worries with someone helps to reduce their power.
Maybe you’re worried about exams, getting into college, or interviewing for that job you really want. If it’s something that concerns you, it concerns your mom, too. No matter how old we get, our moms hold our worries along with us.
Of course, no one should be so overly invested in anyone else’s anxiety that they lose sight of themselves, but sharing the burden can be healing.
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8. Your mom stays up until you get home.
In relation to your mom worrying about your worries, she also worries about you. If she stays up until you get home from a night out, it’s probably because she wouldn’t be able to sleep, anyway, until she knows you’re safe and sound under her roof.
9. Your mom is protective of you.
Moms are inherently protective of their kids; it comes with the territory of parenting. From kissing skinned knees to easing broken hearts, your mom is the fiercest protector of your well-being.
While having an overprotective parent can hinder someone’s independence and sense of self-worth, there’s no denying that having a mama bear in your corner can be a good thing, teaching you strength, resilience, and how to stand up for yourself.
10. Your mom is the one who calls you the most.
Your mom may text you a hundred times a day, but that doesn’t mean she’s not also going to call! If your incoming calls are mostly from your mom, and your voicemail is full of messages from your mom, welcome to the club of being someone’s offspring!
11. Your mom shows interest in your interests.
While it’s not an official love language, sharing the things you’re into could certainly be framed as a way to express your feelings.
Maybe your mom lets you put Taylor Swift’s albums on repeat in the car and listens to your theories about how Taylor and Travis Kelce are soulmates, and she’s not even a Swiftie. Expressing interest in what you love, even if it’s not her thing, is a way of showing care.
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12. Your mom lets you make decisions for yourself.
It might seem like the polar opposite of having a protective mom, but if your mom lets you make your own decisions and your own mistakes, it means she’s exactly the mom you need.
Even if they don’t want to, our moms have to let us fail sometimes. Failing builds resiliency, and lets us know where our growth points are. If your mom can take a step back and let you make decisions about your own life, that’s a sign that she’s rooting for you.
13. Your mom admits when she’s wrong.
An inevitable part of growing up is realizing that parents make mistakes; after all, they’re only human. If your mom can take accountability when she’s wrong, and be able to say she’s sorry when she’s hurt you, that’s a great way to know just how deeply she cares about her own growth, and yours, too.
14. Your mom shows you respect.
Another inevitable part of growing up is having your mom be disappointed in you. She might not agree with your choices, but she also doesn’t insert herself in your life or try to change your mind, which are both examples of ways she’s parenting the best she can.
15. Your mom says ‘yes’ when she can, but isn’t afraid to say ‘no.’
Contrary to popular opinion, moms have lives outside of their kids. Shocking, I know.
If your mom provides for you when she’s able, but doesn’t overcommit herself, she’s the mom for you. Sometimes we have to say "no" to nurture our "yes." Being able to say both at the right time is an important lesson to learn.
No parent-child relationship is without conflict. If your mom shows up in any of these ways, it means she’s exactly the mom you need.
Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team. She covers parenting, pop culture analysis, and all things to do with the entertainment industry.