How To Make Your Wife Totally Sex-Crazed Again (Without Her Even Realizing It)
Your wife deserves hot sex, too.
Dragana Gordic / Shutterstock Marriage is tough, we all know that. However, it's not natural for your missus to lose her libido and become a “cold fish wife.” As much as it frustrates you, it's frustrating her, too — so much that she doesn't even want to think about sex.
So what could be the problem here? Is there a way to learn how to boost a wife's libido without going to a sex therapist and without embarrassing her?
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Yes, there are actually a few different ways you can politely broach the subject.
The first and most obvious way is to romance the woman you married.
The is the easy way and it doesn't require a lot of awkward conversation. You simply romance the woman like you're 18 again and treat her to a day full of fun, freedom, frolicking and fornicating.
Perhaps you can treat her to a romantic dinner, followed by a visit to a spa.
Who knows, maybe she's into some real kinky things but is afraid to tell you. Maybe a sex chat is all you need to get back that fire.
The point is, have you really “tried” to have sex with your wife lately? No, you probably just want sex for free. Unfortunately, that doesn't do much for the libido.
Routines take the magic away from sex. They turn something erotic and pleasurable into something familiar, half-hearted, rushed and, of course, stuck in between episodes of raising babies and working full-time.
If you really want to learn how to boost a wife's libido and jump start her excitement, then it's time to put the passion back into your lives. Back into your “requests.”
Here are a few ideas for how to make your wife horny again.
1. Plan a day together.
First, plan a day where you and her can spend the whole day together, without interruption. Tell her how beautiful she is and how horny she's making you. Instead of wanting sex right away, tease her a little bit, whispering sweet nothings into her ear and texting her some dirty visuals about what you're going to do to her.
2. Be unpredictable.
After a romantic dinner, instead of having sex the old-fashioned way, try something new — like a new sexual position, or tying her to the bed post. Something really kinky that will make her wonder, “Wow, what's up with him?”
The unpredictability will score you major points and she will give you an orgasm like the sweetheart you remember.
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3. Have an Honest Conversation
While sexual boredom accounts for the majority of loss of libido, it's important to remember that health and fitness are also extremely important, especially as we age. This is true of men and women. If you don't go on the offensive — meaning you start eating better, working out every day, and supplementing nutrients — then your natural libido will take a dive. If you're overweight it will crash and burn.
Of course, this is a delicate subject matter to discuss with your wife. So don't take the angle of “You have a problem.” Talk about “us,” the two of you, improving your sex life. If she seems confused or alarmed, reassure her that you miss making love the way you used to and that you are still attracted to her.
If she agrees, you may both benefit from taking natural herbal supplements (as opposed to risky hormone replacement therapy) such as Horny Goat Weed or Maca Root, which has been shown to improve female libido as well as that of males.
In general, it's best to avoid eating processed foods, meats and sugar and drastically increase your intake of fruits and vegetables.
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Some of these foods like bananas, asparagus, blueberries, and so on, are not truly aphrodisiacs — they are just healthy foods that can correct fluctuating hormone levels by loading in some much-needed nutrients. A healthy body is a horny body.
If you want to know how to boost your wife's libido, invest in yourself, your resources, and your attention.
Take the lead and take your wife by the hand, leading her to a new, rewarding sex life.
Nick Hardwick is an author, sex coach and sex educator and expert based in Montreal.