5 Ways To Love Yourself More By REALLY Getting To Know Yourself

One of the most attractive qualities in anybody is confidence. When someone knows exactly who they are, they’re happier and the kind of people who others want to be around.

Getting to that point is a little more complicated, however. You need to get to know yourself in order to truly love yourself.

Self-awareness is a term that gets thrown around a lot, but most people don’t ever take the time to understand what the benefits really are. According to psychologist Daniel Goleman, non-judgmental self-awareness is the cornerstone of emotional intelligence.

"The ability to monitor our emotions and thoughts from moment to moment is key to understanding ourselves better, being at peace with who we are and proactively managing our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors," Goleman explains. "In addition, self-aware people tend to act consciously rather than react passively, to be in good psychological health and to have a positive outlook on life."

Not exactly sure where to start? Here are some ways you can love yourself more by getting to know yourself a little better:

1. Try new things.

People who are very self-aware tend to try new things on a regular basis because they understand the value. When you try new things, you learn more about who you are and how you respond in certain situations. If you’re stuck in a rut and don’t feel like you know yourself very well, try something new.

For example, take up water skiing. Buy a pair of water skis, find a friend or instructor to teach you the ropes, and make it your hobby for the summer. Maybe gardening sounds more interesting? Research the basics and try your hand at it.

2. Write things down.

Self-aware people spend time writing down their thoughts. This sometimes looks like journaling, doodling, or writing short stories. The value in this is the act of pausing and taking the time to crystallize your thoughts.

If you’ve never tried journaling in the past, start out slow and create room for it in your daily schedule. Try 10 minutes per day for two weeks. If this works, try 30 minutes per day for a month. Like any discipline, the more you practice, the better you’ll get.

3. Take a self-evaluation.

Sometimes you might need a little more structure in order to understand who you are. While they aren't perfect, by any means self-assessment tests like these can help you gauge your strengths and weaknesses, personality proclivities, and values.

Take a couple of these and study your results. If nothing else, they’ll help you recognize areas where you can grow.

4. Define your goals and dreams.

When it comes to goals and dreams, most people think they have a pretty good idea of where they want to be. However, if someone were to ask you for the details, you’d probably come up short. This reveals a pretty significant gap that needs to be filled.

In order to learn more about yourself, set aside some time to write out your goals and create specific definitions, checklists, and objectives for them. This simple act will give you some much-needed clarity.

5. Focus on yourself.

Everywhere you turn, people are telling you to be selfless and focus on others. And while there’s certainly merit in serving others and helping them through times of trouble, it’s impossible to be a valuable member of society without first knowing yourself.

Spend some time focusing on yourself and seek to understand your strengths, weaknesses, hopes, dreams, and fears. This sort of reflection will ultimately instill confidence, which is attractive to everyone around you.