The REAL Reasons People Love Golden Showers & 'Water Sport' Fetishes

Simply put, a golden shower is when someone pees on someone else as part of sex.

One conservative estimate says that 9 percent of people have this fetish, while another states that approximately 36 percent of people identify as kinky have this fetish. However, this is far from the whole story.  

There are a number of types of pee fetishes, which as a category are often referred to as Water Sports.

Some people like to watch other people pee.

There are voyeurs with a specific favorite activity to watch.

There are websites devoted to toilet cams (a camera in a toilet so that there is a point of view video of the woman peeing).  

There are websites devoted to people peeing outdoors and people wetting themselves.

Some people like to pee in public or semi-public. They combine exhibitionism with peeing. "Pussing" is a British term for a fetish that involves watching someone pee in a public or semi-public place. Half the excitement of "pussing" is smuggling the watcher into the loo.    

Omorashi is a Japanese term to describe a fetish for having a bladder so full that you need to pee urgently and getting sexually aroused by this sensation or sexually aroused by forcing someone to be in this position or watching someone in this position. There are Japanese erotic video games that have omorashi scenes, as well as some with an entire focus revolving around omorashi.  

Then there are the people who love to wet their panties "accidentally" or to observe "accidents."  

The pee fetish people are most fascinated with is golden showers.  

A few quick facts about golden showers:

• A healthy person’s urine is 95 percent water and is sterile so drinking it in small amounts is not a problem. However, if the person has an infection, then this is not a great idea.
• Many people who practice golden showers drink lots of water so the urine is dilute.
• The desire to humiliate is motivation for a lot of people who give golden showers and the desire to be humiliated is motivation for a lot of people who receive golden showers.
• Some people believe that sharing in this fetish is a way to let down all barriers with your partner and be completely open.

Golden showers are often tied to practices of Dominance and submission. 

The dominant person uses the submissive person to pee on (or in) as a way of humiliating or further subjugating the person.

Havelock Ellis was an English doctor who studied human sexuality in the early 20th century. He was one of the first to talk about this fetish and also to admit that he had this fetish. He traced it back to washing his mother’s back while she peed. Lots of people who enjoy golden showers can trace their desire back to a time where they became aroused and urine was present.  

Many people who enjoy golden showers feel extreme shame during the experience, after the experience or at both times. Many report fetishes beginning in childhood and being shamed by their parents for sexual behavior.

Even today children who are caught masturbating are often told they are dirty or disgusting or that their genitals are dirty or disgusting. This creates a link between shame and sexuality that is often very difficult to sever. For some, shame becomes an integral part of sex and they will seek out humiliation. These people find humiliation a turn on.

However, they don’t usually experience shame as all positive.

Many feel shame after these activities and can feel intense self-loathing and self-hatred. For others, the link between shame and sex makes it very difficult for them to enjoy any sexual activity. In these cases, therapy to deal with the shame and uncover where it has come from is often needed so that person can enjoy sex in the future.

Many people enjoy golden showers as a regular part of their sexual lives.

Most find the warmth of the pee erotic.

Both men and women enjoy both sides of the golden shower. Men who like to let go of control often enjoy receiving golden showers from powerful women, and women who enjoy letting go of control like to receive golden showers from powerful men —  and/or may enjoy "wetting their panties."    

The forbidden aspect of this fetish increases the excitement for all participants.  

We've all experienced that fear of not being able to make it to the restroom on time. For people turned on by this fetish, sometimes the pressure of having to go starts out as erotic —  but if left too long can become painful —  and the relief they feel when finally able to let go is palpable. Water sports fetishists amplify these responses in a conscious attempt to increase their pleasure.

Dr. Lori Beth Bisbey is kink-knowledgable intimacy/sex coach and psychologist who helps individuals, couples and polyamorous groups create their ideal lasting relationships. You can sign up for her newsletter and find out more about her adventures on her website and check out The A to Z of Sex podcast on iTunes. Write to her with your questions by clicking here.