9 Tiny First Date Tips That Basically Guarantee A Second
How to make the best first impression on a date.
Mixmike | Canva Dating plays a vital role in the matchmaking process, and first dates are an especially great opportunity to get to know someone new and see if you're a good fit. It's a way to get out there and find who and what exactly works for you. First dates can be nerve-wracking at times. After all, figuring out how to get a girl or guy to like you based on just one date sounds daunting. Everyone wants their first date to go well, but not many daters know what to do on a date to make someone like them or what first date tips they need to follow. So, what can you do to ensure that both you and your date have fun, while you get to know each other and develop a deeper connection?
Here are 11 first-date tips that basically guarantee a second:
1. Choose the right place to meet
Make it a quiet, neutral place convenient and accessible to both of you, outside of your home or apartment, and away from noisy bars and distractions. You want to be able to communicate easily and hear all the details of the conversation.
2. Stay focused on the other person
Avoid distractions during your date. Focus and relate directly to your date and listen to what they have to say. Be curious and ask follow-up questions to their stories. This is especially helpful if you tend to be nervous or quiet at first!
3. Keep the conversation balanced
Don’t monopolize the conversation with a rambling, verbal resume about yourself or your accomplishments. You may think you are impressing your date, but often, talking too much on a date will make the other person lose interest and feel you are self-involved. Make sure it’s a give-and-take and show your curious side.
4. Flirt with your date
Flirting is a great way to show someone you are interested in them. Make eye contact, smile, be curious, interact, and engage with members of the opposite gender. Rest assured, your positive, open, flirtatious aura will attract attention.
5. Stay in the present
Avoid talking about an ex or any horror stories from the past. As tempting as this can be, it is a lose-lose situation. Instead, concentrate on interests or points of view you have in common. Enjoy finding out about someone new and discovering what you are like now with this new person.
6. Be positive
Everyone is attracted to someone happy. Leave your worries at home when you go out on a date. Dating is an opportunity to go on vacation from your daily grind. Give your date and yourself a break during this time. The more upbeat you feel, the more attractive and magnetic you are.
7. Don’t be intimate on the first date
Showing someone you are interested or attracted to them by flirting is one thing, but maintain boundaries by leaving some mystery for the second date. Getting intimate right away doesn’t usually work out. Allow yourself time to balance physical attraction with other important elements like basic values and communication as well as discovering similar outlooks and interests. Give your date a chance to be more than just an intimate encounter.
8. Take your time
Give yourself time to discover how you feel about this person and how they feel about you. You can’t rush a relationship or take it faster than the pace at which each of you is comfortable. Enjoy savoring the moment. Try and learn to read the body language of your date. Look at what they are telling you both verbally and nonverbally. Try to be honest with yourself. If you sense your attraction to them is not reciprocated, don’t force the issue. If this person is not right for you, save your energy for someone who is. And if you’re the less interested one, don’t be rude but don’t lead them on either.
10. Follow up after the date
If you are interested in seeing this person again, don’t play games. Call them, ask them out again, or return their call if they call you first. Don’t make the other person guess where you stand. Be honest and communicate. There is nothing ruder than unreturned phone calls.
11. Try and try again
Dating can take practice. Learn from it and don’t get discouraged. The more you get out there, the more opportunity you have to meet others. When it is right, you will find that person who sees how special you are. Remember your great qualities and lead every date with those qualities you feel best about. If you feel it and believe it, it will shine through. Dating can be tricky, but with these tips, you are now on your way to a successful and enjoyable dating experience!
Lisa Clampitt is the Founder & President of The Matchmaking Institute and CEO of Lisa Clampitt Matchmaking.